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Cheating In A Relationship – Is Breaking Up The Only Answer?
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Cheating In A Relationship – Is Breaking Up The Only Answer?

Cheating in a relationship is very damaging, but breakup or divorce isn’t always the right answer. Figuring out what to do isn’t always easy, but it is worth your time to figure things out as carefully as possible. Here are a few things to keep in mind while trying to figure out what to do once cheating has occurred.

Has it happened before now? If your partner has a history of cheating, that is going to make it harder to trust him from this point on. Anyone can make a mistake, but it the mistake is made repeatedly, it’s not really a ‘mistake’, now is it?

How long did the cheating go on? The longer your partner was cheating, the worse it is going to feel. It still hurts like crazy, but a one night stand feels differently than an ongoing affair that lasted for years. That can take quite a while to recover from.

How long have you been together? This can cut both ways. A couple in a newer relationship may have and easier time with forgiveness because there may be less of an attachment, but it also may make it easier to just walk away.

Do the two of you have children together? If you do, your first responsibility is to them. That doesn’t automatically mean you have to stay together if it is going to make their lives worse and you may need to consider a separation. What you need to keep in mind is that what you feel is better, may not actually be the best answer. What is really best for the children needs to be kept first and foremost in your minds, no matter how badly you are hurting.

If a break up is the only way you can see to fix things, then by all means, make sure you and your partner do it as amicably as possible. Especially if you have children involved. You have been hurt by your partner’s cheating, but the children are losing their family and their security. You don’t have to make things uglier and hold a grudge forever. Make a clean break and get life sorted out as quickly as you can, for their benefit and yours.

Deciding to stay together is going to be a lot of work. You and your partner have to be totally committed to making things better in the relationship. It won’t be easy to forgive your partner for cheating. Rebuilding trust and learning to forgive is a slow and sometimes painful process, but completely necessary if the relationship is going to survive. Forgiving doesn’t mean that you will forget or ignore what happened, it only means that you aren’t going to hold it against your partner forever. The sooner you are able to forgive them, the better you will feel.

Start to rebuild the trust in your relationship in small steps. Figure out things you can trust your partner to do and let them begin to win your trust back. As you are able to increase the trust level, your relationship will improve. And that is one way to fight cheating in a relationship.


Street Talk

Lacey, your articles are really good. Keep up the good work!

Reply
  about 1 decade ago

Thanks Shawn! Appreciate the kind words.

Reply
  about 1 decade ago
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