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Rebuilding trust after an affair is the most difficult aspect of surviving an affair. The trust level after an affair greatly diminishes making it hard to move forward with the relationship. After all the affair made you look like a fool, so it is normal that you are wary of falling prey to the same situation again.
The cheater in a relationship carries the greater responsibility as far as rebuilding trust is concerned. Trust levels greatly fluctuate after an affair, one moment you may feel like you are able to trust your partner again but then something might happen( like a phone call or message from an unknown person) that makes that trust shaky again.
If this is your situation, take it easy. Trust will take time to rebuild so be patient with your spouse and yourself.
The only way to really rebuild trust in a relationship after an affair is for the cheater to be completely transparent. Every attempt your spouse makes in being transparent with you will help grow your trust for them again.
Below are 12 ways to be completely transparent with your partner so as to avoid all suspicion.
1. Let your partner have access to all emails and mails. Make sure you have deleted all accounts and phone numbers you used to communicate with the person you cheated with.
2. Be financially transparent. let them know your salary, purchases , expenses etc
3. Make sure they know who you are with whenever you have a call.
4. Avoid surprises at all costs because surprises even with good intentions will at this time only arouse suspicion. If you want to do something special for them simply let them know about it.
5. Share what’s going on with you at your job in details. This includes all your relationships and how you deal with them.
6. If you cannot make it home on time call and let them know.
7. If you are held up at work and for some reason will be late or if you are on a trip do your best to stay in touch as often as you can so they are not left in suspicion. Never let your partner wonder about your whereabouts.
8. Set specific times to call so they know when to expect your calls when you are away from home and sometimes surprise them with by calling at other times when they least expect.
9. If you leave the house, let them know where you are going and who you will be with and appraoximately when you will be back.
10. Make sure your cell phone is always on so you are reachable.
11. Show all receipts of all purchases, expenses etc
12. If they can’t be reached when you call, leave a message so they know you did.
Rebuilding trust after an affair can be very challenging. Many people are unwilling to go to the lengths explained above but that just goes to show that they are not serious about saving their marriage after an affair.
How important is your marriage to you? Are you willing to do all it takes to rebuild your marriage after the affair? Then the above tips are a great place to start. As you work on rebuilding trust word for word and deed for deed, You will eventually reap the reward of earning your partner’s trust again.
The above tips will set you on the right path towards rebuilding trust after an affair.
Want to know more? Check out my blog for more information on how to rebuild trust after an affair.
howcanyousaveyourmarriage.com.
Suzzy is an ESL instructor and internet writer who enjoys writing about relationships.
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