Are you struggling with adultery and considering divorce after your trust has been betrayed and your heart has been broken? Well, infidelity is one of those marriage problems that can quickly and easily end a marriage or relationship. However, that doesn't have to be what happens to you.

There are basically three things that will happen after an affair is uncovered;

• The couple splits up pretty soon after the adulterous behavior is discovered and then divorce. The relationship terminates and healing and forgiveness are never realized.

• The individuals work through the infidelity and the cheater is forgiven for breaking the trust and love. They still separate but are no longer wounded because of the affair.

• The couple stays together and learns how to forgive, rebuild trust and enjoys a renewed relationship and life together.

Now, I’m not going to say which of the three is the best approach to take but I’m hoping that you are striving for the last one (staying together and living happily ever after).

You probably have been told that adultery and divorce go together. I’m here to tell you that it’s not true. Sure it’s a tough marriage obstacle to overcome but couples recover from infidelity and avoid divorce all the time.

I know the pain you are feeling and resentment you have toward your spouse or partner makes it difficult for you to imagine staying together. Will you take a moment and look into the future with me regarding what if?

• What if your soul-mate did everything you asked or needed to get back into good graces with you? Would you be willing to try to work things out?

• What if all the things that were missing or wrong with your relationship before the adultery occurred were no longer an issue, would you consider giving him or her another chance?

• If I told you that the pain you are feeling and thoughts of divorce due to the adultery could be replaced with unconditional love and peace, would it be worth a try?

I hope you will allow yourself to block out the negative thoughts and images and see how it might be possible to restore your relationship after infidelity and avoid divorce.

You also should be striving for more than just surviving adultery. What I want for you is a relationship stronger than you had before the unfaithfulness was uncovered. Your new relationship should be full of passion and trust and respect and it can be if you take the right steps and necessary action.

You have a big say so on how things turn out. What ever you do, please don’t just throw in the towel and head for divorce court. You owe it to yourself and your partner to try to work things out. At the end of the process you should at a minimum be healed and be able to forgive your cheating partner. However, my hope is that you shoot for the big prize, a renewed relationship. If you want expert help on getting past the adultery and avoiding divorce, please read here; Affair Repair

Finally, I know the road you are traveling is not an easy one. Please don’t let discouragement and frustration get in the way of your healing. Again, for guidance on dealing with infidelity, see here; Affair Repair