Learning your spouse cheated on you has left you devastated and lost. Your life might feel like it is spiraling out of control now. But there is good news over the horizon if you take the right steps starting with surviving the affair.

The problem isn't your spouse cheated on you. The problem is much deeper than that. It could be problems in your marriage that can be fixed. It can also be that your spouse is always going to be a cheater. You just don't know at this point.

There are several reasons why a spouse cheats. None of which are valid excuses and you are never to blame. He/she is usually influenced by their inner voice that talks them into the wrong behavior because of external influences such as being unhappy in their marriage.

Rather than talking it over with the non-cheating spouse he/she strays from the marriage. A sympathetic ear can turn into an emotional affair that eventually leads to a physical affair. The good news is it is not too late to end the affair, rebuild trust, and wipe the slate clean.

Imagine a time when you were in total control of yourself. Let your-self drift back to that time and remember how it was. Important decisions were always made knowing everything first. Better yet, would you have made any important decisions because you were hurt?

Making any decisions about your marriage now won't give you peace of mind. You will always be haunted by unanswered questions. You need to do something that will address the real problems with your marriage and it is not just the affair.

What caused your spouse to cheat on you? Was it something in the marriage? Knowing this is an important step to regaining control of your life and surviving after an affair. The truth will give you direction to fixing the problem with an even bigger pay-off in the end.

The pay-off will be your happiness. Knowing the real problems of the marriage you release any doubts you may be thinking now. That is because you will be 100% sure of making the right choices in your marriage and in your life.

You will feel confident in your heart and mind choosing to rebuild trust, and wipe the slate clean to save the marriage. You will also have no doubts if you decide you have no other choice but to end the marriage. It's that simple!

So what are you going to do? Are you going to let your hurt feelings control your life much the same way your spouse let his/her inner thoughts control their choice to choose? Or are you going to take the time to survive an affair, learn why your spouse cheated, and then make the best choice posible?

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