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One of the things that characterize anxiety disorder and panic is the strong dependence that the person feels compared to emotional relationships: The relationship then becomes synonymous with control, received and offered by both parties, who live in a narrowing of the autonomy staff. It is interesting to note that the reference to the legitimacy and, for most of the time, a reminder of values that appear in the unquestionable moral perspective.
This approach is understandable only if you read it in a psychological manner. The reference to ensure the justified, under the guise of the role emotional, the most varied forms of psychological violence. The role of affective relationships appears to be justified, so attitudes are far from legitimate.
One of the clearest examples is the case of the intrusive, invasive mother, which seeks to inform and participate in everything that concerns the life of the child, the mother justifies this attitude with the role she plays in the name of protection and of unconditional love for the child which is not only the right but, rather, the duty to know everything about him or her.
A similar case is that of the husband's possessive and jealous behaviour that justifies the control of his wife with the legitimate protection of the emotional relationship.
Some may seem excessive, citing these behaviors, talk about forms of violence, but it is important to clarify that the ones I'm referring to, are part of all those situations that restrict personal autonomy, creating bonds of symbiotic dependence.
To quote the words of a client, "it is not bonds, but ties" or straps that tighten and force of the obligation of the report.
And then the claim that the other love "is her"; his property becomes a fact which admits some level of problems: news stories are often filled with criminal events, dictated by passion. Love in this sense is the exercise of power to the other, disguised as noble feelings.
This way of building relationships by building it on the authority exercised on the other has deep roots and very often are structured as the premises of personal insecurity.
Who exercises control and authority is saying something very significant about him; he is asserting his own fear to engage in their own personal challenges and rests in a sort of symbiotic relationship not to confront the negative image of them.
Against the authority of those who suffer often unconsciously think they cannot do anything to change that.
Those who suffer control usually adduced as reasons for the search of protection, the fear of taking risks or perception of a personal failure.
It happened at least once in the life of each of us to be in a particular moment, in which we feel that we do not have the resources to tackle the problems that arise daily.
Sometimes, however, this lack of tools to deal with problems both large and small is perceived as a condition of personal inadequacy, of the inability to find a solution, do not feel sufficiently "prepared", and we get stuck in front of obstacles that are perceived to be unsolvable.
We then move on to a sort of protection mode to avoid the fear and insecurity of life, taking refuge in the other's protection, with the hope of being able to resolve our fears through the support of those who love us.
"We then move on to a sort of protection mode to avoid the fear and insecurity of life, taking refuge in the other's protection, with the hope of being able to resolve our fears through the support of those who love us." Hit it dead on there.. Thank you for taking the time to write such an informative article. I've learned a few things about myself today :)
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