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Discipline is an important part of every child's upbringing but, how you discipline your child is equally important. When it comes to toddlers, especially, you need to be careful on how you discipline them and why. Just like all misbehaving children, toddlers need to know that there are consequences for their actions but, harsh punishment and yelling can effect your toddler is ways you may not realize.
For instance, did you know that research has shown that yelling at your toddler can result in developmental delays, particularly pertaining to their speech? It's difficult to know what effects your parenting tactics can have on your child in the long run but, I think most parents can agree that love, attention, and earned rewards are always better than punishment when it can be avoided. Positive discipline for toddlers is the best way to get them to listen and learn, and it all starts with proactive parenting.
Being a proactive parent isn't as difficult as it may seem at times, and if you throw in a little playful parenting along the way, it can even be fun for the both of you. Proactive parenting is exactly what it sounds like: being proactively involved with your toddlers actions to avoid negative outcomes. If you recognize that your child is about to throw a fit and why, you can avoid the negative situation by intervening. If you see that your toddler is about to do something that they shouldn't, you can stop them from doing it and explain why they shouldn't without having to punish them because, they haven't done anything wrong yet.
Avoiding punishment is the reason I cling to proactive parenting rather than being a reactive parent. I hate punishing my son, even when I have no choice because he's done something wrong, and it's my responsibility as a parent to enforce the rules he doesn't always want to follow. It makes it more difficult if your toddler doesn't talk yet or if their speech is still very limited. Your child understands that you're saying, "no", but, doesn't understand why. I like being proactive, I like distracting my son with a loud, funny voice to keep his attention on me and away from the action that was about to get him in trouble. And if I can't stop him from doing it? I try to be as positive about that too!
So, these are my tips for positive discipline for toddlers. Say no but, explain why you're saying no. Adding the expletive will keep your toddlers attention on you, keep there attention away from what they weren't suppose to do, and keep the word "no" from becoming boring. Turn the word "no" into a game if you can. Instead of simply saying, "no", try saying something like, "don't do that, I'm gonna get if you if you do that, you know not to do that", and say it in a playful, goofy, and happy manner. Again, it keeps their attention on you and away from what their not suppose to be doing, and should make them laugh in the process.
Now, if you can't stop them from doing something wrong then, stay positive and playful. Tell them that their not suppose to be doing that, then get them to help you resolve the situation. For example, my son absolutely loves taking things off of my work desk. He's not suppose to and usually I keep a good enough eye on him that he doesn't but, I'm not perfect. He's been known to grab things when I'm doing something else or not looking.
I don't get mad (usually, like I said I'm not perfect). I look at him and say, "Hey, you're not suppose to have that". Then, making sure he's still holding on to whatever it was he grabbed (usually my cordless mouse), I take his hand, walk him back to my desk, and have him put it back all the while explaining why he isn't suppose to play with that, and then rewarding him with clapping and cheers for putting back where it belongs. That may not have been the best example but, I'm sure you get my point.
Positive discipline for toddlers is the best tactic to take to keep your toddler's attention, to maintain their obedience, and, most importantly, to keep their respect. Now, some toddlers have more severe disciplinary issues than others, and you need to know that there are resources out there to help with these as well. There are many books you can read on the topic, you can talk to friends, family, your child's pediatrician, and even web services that are meant to assist with this issue. I hope these tips on positive discipline for toddlers has given you some useful advise on how to be proactive with your toddler. Thank you!
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