You probably recently had your world fall down around you when you found out that your spouse/significant other had an affair. This can shatter families and couples. There are ways to help you get over an affair. First you need to give yourself time to think through all of your emotions. You have to make sure the affair is over. Then you will need to learn to communicate with each other again.

Giving yourself some time to heal and wrap your head around your emotions is very important. At first all these questions are going through your head that are only making the situation worse. Get the monster out of your head and figure out what your true emotions about the affair are. Use a journal and keep it close. When you feel the monster start to bring you down, get out the journal and start writing in there what you are feeling. This will help you immensely. You will be able to come back to your journal and look at it when you are not as emotional. This will help you find your true feelings.

Make sure the affair is over. If your spouse is still having the affair, this is showing you that they are not willing to make things right and better. Their commitment to you at that point is nonexistent. You will only be able to move forward as a couple when the affair is completely over and it can be proven.

Now it comes to the time to start communicating with each other again. This might seem like something that is inconceivable, but it is possible. Maybe start with a letter to each other. Sometimes it is really hard to say to the persons face what you are truly feeling. Or when the time comes to say what you are feeling, you may get emotional and it doesn’t come out the way that you would like. After you two can start having conversations again, go out together by yourselves and talk like you did when you started dating. In this new communication you may find out things that you never knew.

These are just three ways that can help you get over an affair. It will take time and work on both sides. The affair must be terminated and the two of you start communicating again. After all, you fell in love with this person once. Why can’t you do it again?