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confidence
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Need To Learn To Build Confidence? Self-coaching Is An Option
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It’s a fact of life that some people appear to be naturally confident at everything they do and tackle every new task or challenge with enthusiasm and gusto. However, there are plenty of other people who are confident in some areas of their life but not in others and those that are diffident the majority of the time. If you recognise yourself as someone who lacks confidence, then the most important thing that you can do for yourself is learn how to build confidence in yourself and use these skills to succeed in areas of your life that you never thought were possible.

One of the best ways that you can learn how to build confidence in your life, is by becoming your own coach. This is not something, that you can do overnight and you need to be a balanced coach, but the increased self-awareness you will experience can have an enormous impact on your life. Learning to use self-coaching effectively will help you listen to yourself more, recognise how, when and why you get stuck and can’t move on and identify what barriers hamper you that need to be pulled down or bypassed.

Most people are familiar with the idea of operating within their comfort zone. It’s where most people spend the majority of their time, because no one likes the feeling of being out of control However, the concept behind self –coaching is that you learn skills and how to build confidence that enable you to operate outside of your comfort zone, within a stretch zone. It’s within the stretch zone that you learn and develop at the same time as challenging yourself. Although the stretch zone may feel difficult, it shouldn’t be so difficult that it sends you into the next zone (the panic zone).

The idea of self coaching is that you learn to have regular conversations with yourself, understand your strengths and areas of weakness and limitations and understand the mental maps that you use to run your life and make your choices. In self coaching you don’t try to delete bits of yourself that you don’t like, you learn how to recognise and manage them in a ways which eases the pressure on yourself. On a journey of self-discovery it can help you not just achieve long held wishes but go beyond anything you expected.

Although self-coaching can help you with learning how to build confidence there are a few ground rules that you would need to follow before considering it as an option.

  • Prepare for success. If you’re not committed to change or to work hard at it, you’re wasting your time. It’s not something anyone else can do for you. You have to have the inner strength to say that you will give it a go and pick yourself up if you’re motivation flags.
  • Identify areas of success. Everyone has had success in areas of their life. Make a list of 10 things and stick them up somewhere where you can see them. It will remind you that you already have skills that you can apply to new situations.
  • Start managing your mind. You have to banish any negative self talk when it starts to seep in. Telling yourself your useless, failure or any other negative things is a waste of time and energy.
  • Decide when and where you could do your self-coaching. You need to have the physical and mental space to be able to talk to yourself.

Although I firmly believe that the majority of people are capable of becoming their own coach and learning how to build confidence in themselves, it’s not for everyone. There is no quick fix and it takes time and practice to develop the right skills. But the inner strength and awareness that you gain will enable you to reach new heights of achievement and it’s certainly a viable option for some people. If it’s not for you then an alternative approach is to work with a coach


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