Insecurity is a terrible thing to suffer from in a relationship. It's hard to avoid though when your boyfriend seems to turn tail and run hard and fast in the other direction whenever the dreaded "C" word aka "Commitment" comes up. It may not be much help for your self-esteem at the moment but there are many women who go through the same thing. You see women are looking to fall in love and experience that "happily ever after" sensation. Men aren't always in the market for marriage, family, and whatever comes after commitment takes place. He's going to fight it kicking and screaming no matter how much he loves you because he doesn’t think he's ready for it.
Few men ever truly feel "ready" for it even when it's staring them in the face and they are getting ready to walk down the aisle another time. But how do you know when it's commitment that he fears as a general thing and not specifically being committed to you? It's a good question and one that deserves to be answered. There are several signs though that can help you see for yourself that you are not the problem in his life or the reason that he's shying away from all topics related to being committed to you or anyone else for the moment.
The number one thing you need to keep in mind at a time like this is that love isn't something that's easily faked. You can sometimes talk yourself into believing he loves you when he's not really showing any signs that he does but he isn't going to be able to fool you for long if he isn't really feeling it. Does he make you feel loved? If he does then your worry over commitment could push him away and risk your relationship. If you do not want to find yourself in the dreaded position of trying to get your ex back then you need to really walk soft around the commitment issue until you're sure about what's going on in his mind and heart.
Here are a few questions you can ask to help you determine if he's having problems with you or if it's just his own fears of commitment that are coming between you.
1) Does he call you? Does he answer when you call? In other words, does everything about your relationship appear to be one-sided? 2) Has he introduced you to his friends and/or family? How does he introduce you to these people? Friend? Girlfriend? Is he proud to take you out on the town or does he seem to hid the fact that he's dating you from the world? 3) Does he use words like "I" when talking about the future or "we?" This one is HUGE and has a lot of implications as to whether or not he's thinking about a future with you in it.
Even if these signs are there, all hope is not lost. You can still save your relationship and make it work if you know the right moves to make so don't give up just yet.
Article Views: 4500 Report this Article