This Article is About
anger
tennis coach
older sister
pinnacle
Communication Arguments Anger & Conflict #4
Join 1000's of Authors at StreetArticles Today!

Communication Arguments Anger & Conflict #4

Wrong Messenger

A few days ago while reading the newspaper, there was a story about tennis star Serena Williams, receiving coaching instructions from her older sister Venus. These instructions from father to her, because he felt she could get Serena to do anything. After the match, he congratulated Venus for doing a magnificent job.

But what is really happening here, you have a father who is probably one of the best tennis coach in the world, he has trained two daughters to the pinnacle of the tennis world. He is a hard task master, because he had made earlier comments that he was not interested in training other people children, because he is strict. His daughters are no longer girls but grown women, they may resent his tone now, despite they know he has their interest at heart, they have evolved and he has not.

This is a common problem that we face in our daily lives. Communication when presented in a cordial way is acceptable to all. People are going to get offended if the tone of the instruction or question is not presented in the right fashion to them. This is an example of the right message but the wrong messenger.

Words And Effect

When I was growing up, there was a folk story, which states, " stick and stones my broke my bones, but words cannot harm me". This story is not true , and I say that because, I have never seen a rock or a piece of stick, hurt anybody on its own, it always happens with a little help from somebody or some thing.

For centuries we heard, that words couldn't harm us, and some people still believe that today, arguments and fight all start with words, every hour of the day we have crime, all over the world, because of the way words are presentation, which result in anger from the receiver of verbal barrage.

But how did we get ourselves in this problem in the first place. We know from in the beginning of times, men always had a difficulty controlling emotions of anger, you sometime wonder what is the benefit or purpose, could man not survive without anger? or is it a defensive measure?. That we have not learned to control or understand.

A Fight that Resulted In Murder

About a week ago two cousins, from the Settlement of Curtis Bahamas, got in an argument, which escalated to a fight, one turned to leave, and chopped to death. A few hours after his anger fade away, he realized what he did and the penalty for his crime, he became remorseful. (To Late)

The bible states:

Soft answer turns away wrath, but grievous words stir up anger.

Swift to hear and slow to speak.

Parents do not provoke your children to anger.

Controlling One's Anger Requires Wisdom

I really believe one of the most important gifts a person can have is slow to speak in any communication, this gives you an opportunity to think before your comment increase the tempo of an argument. Soft response always a bonus, grievous words always developed into terrible outcomes. And parents let us not create another generation of angry adults.


Street Talk

I am enjoying this series. I am familiar with anger management courses, this is interesting.

Reply
  about 1 decade ago

Thanks for your comment shawn.

Reply
  about 1 decade ago

It is indeed really difficult to control anger, and it can do so much harm. You could not write a better ending, I loved all your 4 articles

Reply
  about 1 decade ago

Marie, nice to hear from you and thanks for your comment.

Reply
  about 1 decade ago

Words can not only hurt, they can sear your soul. And tte harsh words can replay like a movie in your head if you let them. Not a good thing. Always better to think before you speak. Great article!

Reply
  about 1 decade ago

Hello Lacey, nice to hear from you, thanks for your comment.

Reply
  about 1 decade ago

A great article Alfred.. something for all to learn the art of communication... with grown daughters, two of them, I know how it feels to have to take a step back and rather talk than command...

Reply
  about 1 decade ago

Rob thanks for your comment, shoot me your email, I want to tallk to you about something..

Reply
  about 1 decade ago

Alfred go to my public profile under the Bulldogsturf web site open it and look at contact me, my email address is there...

  
  about 1 decade ago

My daughter was very easy to communicate with but my girlfriends kids are very difficult and it takes a lot of work communicating with them.

Reply
  about 1 decade ago

Its going to take a little, they were brought up by other people, it requires work.

Reply
  about 1 decade ago

I strongly agree with you....proved it to myself and kids. I always approached my 3 already grown up kids...in a soft tone of voice and we communicate to each other very often...very powerful. You truly made a good points there, Alfred. Thanks!

Reply
  about 1 decade ago

Communicating is something we do all the time, but perfecting it to satisfy can be a challage .

Reply
  about 1 decade ago
You May Also Like
Transforming Anger
Country music star Tim McGraw sings a song with this line: "I don't know why you gotta' be angry all the time." It's a good question for us to ponder, especially those of us who find ourselves expressing anger more than any other emotion. It's easy, however, to become so…
By: Kathy Manis Findley in  Self Improvement  >  Anger Management   Aug 07, 2013  
2
  Likes: 1

Transforming Anger In Young People
There is, without a doubt, a great deal of anger being expressed these days.Working with teenagers is one area where you will find young people enraged and, most often, having no idea why they are angry. The single most requested extracurricular class requested by schools these days is Anger Management.…
By: Kathy Manis Findley in  Self Improvement  >  Anger Management   Aug 08, 2013  
0
  Likes: 2

Communication Arguments Anger & Conflict #3
How Men and Women Dealing with Infidelity The emotional response from a man or a woman caught in the act of infidelity, is quite different. I am not going to discuss the extreme cases where violence displayed, because of emotional hurt, but the basic communication response. In the case of…
By:  in  Relationships  >  Communication   Jul 17, 2012  
8
  Likes: 2

Communication Arguments Anger & Conflict #1
Many of the troubles, in this world, are the results of anger, by people who cannot control their violent emotion, this lack of control has made our cities and town unsafe, I will try to find out how and why man kind has not been able to control his communications,…
By:  in  Relationships  >  Communication   Jul 10, 2012  
11
  Likes: 3

Communication Arguments Anger & Conflict #2
This escalation of verbal conflict, if not controlled at its embryonic stage, could rise to verbal abuse and physical assault. In America whether it be man or woman physical or verbal abuse is an offence, you can't even spank your child for being rude. My sister told me a few…
By:  in  Relationships  >  Conflict   Jul 12, 2012  
5
  Likes: 3

Is Anger Ruining Your Relationship?
Maintaining a successful relationship is challenging, more so if you have anger management issues. Since no relationship is perfect, there will be times that you and your partner will fight and disagree. If you don’t know how to keep tabs on your anger, you might do or say something to…
By: Matt7 in  Relationships  >  Conflict   Aug 15, 2011  
0
  Likes: 0

Learn How to Better Manage Your Anger
We live in a very angry and cruel world. There are wars in many nations some we hear about on the news and some we know little to nothing about. There is violence in our major cities and even rural towns, maybe even in your own neighborhood or home. You…
By: Julie Larralde in  Self Improvement  >  Anger Management   Jul 07, 2011  
1
  Likes: 0

How to Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back After You Broke Up With Him
So you are wondering how to get your ex boyfriend back after you broke up with him. Boys and girls are different by nature and they see things in different views. If you cheated on him, then he may keep the anger for a long time. You should bear in…
By: Alex J Steve in  Relationships  >  Conflict   Oct 25, 2012  
134
  Likes: 21

How to Get Your Ex Guy Back - Easy Tricks To Get Him Adore You
Breaking up with someone you have been in a relationship with can be very hard or being broken up with can sometimes be even harder. Lots of the time once a couple has split up then that is that and they will either go off their own separate ways and…
By: A. B. Sahu in  Relationships  >  Conflict   Sep 03, 2012  
0
  Likes: 2

Use You Common Sense to Win Your Love Back
So you’ve split up but realise that you want to win your love back and you want to go about it the right way, without jeopardising any chances you have of getting back together. Many people want to win their love back but don't understand the correct way of going…
By: Molly Saker in  Relationships  >  Love   Dec 05, 2011  
0
  Likes: 3

Calling My Ex Boyfriend - What To Do And Say
Calling your ex boyfriend, or receiving a call from an ex boyfriend is no easy task. Especially if there are still feelings involved and your nerves are at an all time high. You will have to get over this discomfort though if you want it to be a success. The…
By: Charlotte Jane in  Relationships  >  Communication   Sep 05, 2012  
0
  Likes: 2

How To Get Your Ex Back Fast - Hereis The Fast Solution
So you are trying too hard to find out the possible ways of how to get your ex back fast. You have to learn the process to fix the problem to get your ex back. Maybe there are lots of reasons for your broken relationship, yet you can do something…
By: A. B. Sahu in  Relationships  >  Conflict   Feb 29, 2012  
13
  Likes: 2

How to Get Your Boyfriend Back After He Seems to Have Moved on
Sometimes it seems like your ex has moved on without you. You want to know how to get your boyfriend back now more than ever but you think it's impossible. It is possible that he hasn't moved on as much as you believe he has or even as much as…
By: T Dub Jackson in  Relationships  >  Conflict   Mar 14, 2011  
13
  Likes: 12

Setting Goals for Maximum Performance
Regardless to whether you are an amateur playing for fun or a world class professional tennis player, you always want to show your best tennis. Since everything should be done according to the plan or schedule, to achieve best results you need to set goals. Goal setting would include both…
By: Luca Godano in  Recreation and Sports  >  Tennis   Dec 15, 2012  
1
  Likes: 3

How to Get A Woman to Love You
It’s not as hard as you think. You can learn how to get a woman to love you, by simply learning the art of buying flowers for women, would definitely ensure your esteem in their eyes and ultimately seal the deal. Letting a woman know how much you care for…
By: Afees Alli in  Relationships  >  Communication   May 20, 2016  
0
  Likes: 0

Article Views: 2258    Report this Article