Your relationship ended, and it wasn't what you wanted or expected to happen. Not only does your present seem a lot less pleasant, but it's playing with your ideas for the future as well. You are certain that you want to get back together with your ex and that the breakup was nothing more than a simple bump on the road to true happiness. Unfortunately, your efforts to open the lines of communication have been met with silence, and you realize that without talking your overall goals are moving farther and farther away. Not only is there a real reason for the apparent cold-shoulder, there are ways you can overcome it as long as you choose your moves carefully and act in a manner that will increase your chances.

If this whole situation seems like a waking nightmare, you're not alone. As hard as it may be to stay positive, don't allow the self-doubt to take over now. Blindly following all of your impulses may not be in your best interest, so weigh your options carefully and make sure that you're doing everything possible to put your best face forward.

Putting Yourself in the Best Position:

Your initial reaction to the news may have been less than positive, and no one can really blame you for your knee-jerk response to such devastating news. It's not too late, though, to start using your head and not simply relying on your heart. How you act now is going to go a long way towards accomplishing your overall goals, and you want to make sure those actions match up with what you hope to accomplish. The following guidelines can go a long way to portray yourself positively - and rebuild a lot of your self-confidence in the process.

- Resist the urge to push:

Instead of following your ex around trying to explain why you believe they were mistaken to breakup with you, let them go. This isn't going to be permanent, but patience is going to be your best ally throughout the process. If you start pulling back and giving them some space, they're not going to be as inclined to run from you when the time to approach them finally comes.

- Don't succumb to the dark side:

Depression is a serious adversary throughout the breakup process. Mourning the loss of a relationship is something that takes time, but throughout the process it's important to keep your eye on the prize. That means refusing to succumb to the often-overwhelming urge to give up and call it quits. Instead, makes steps towards overcoming the emotions involved and look for the ray of sunshine past the storm clouds you're currently experiencing.

- Overcome the urge to stay away from social situations:

Going out on the town may seem like the last thing you want to do, but it's going to go a long way towards re-establishing your own self-confidence and the way your ex currently views you. It's not going to be easy, and you don't have to jump into the fray all at once. Take your time, but make the effort to put yourself out there. Not only can you start to regain your confidence, but your ex is also going to take notice - and start to wonder if leaving the relationship was really the best choice to make.

- Look to the past for answers in the present:

Take some time to relive the budding stages of your relationship. What do you think attracted your ex in the first place? What kind of personality traits did you exhibit normally? What changed throughout the course of your relationship? It's possible that things fell by the wayside while you were together. Bringing them back to life can significantly increase your attractiveness - even to your ex.

Understanding your Ex's point of View

Did you try to start a conversation hours or days after you found out it was over? If you moved too quickly, it's possible that your timing contributed to their current silence. Breakups take time to sink in and no one wants to be confronted by the person they hurt immediately after the fact. Right now you want to take your time and think before speaking. That also means not sending message after message without allowing time for a response. Even though you don't think it's a problem, your ex's perspective might be vastly different from your own. Try to imagine what they'd think or feel after receiving several messages back to back. Limit your contact and keep things positive. Giving them some time and space is going to increase your chances of getting a response.

Getting back together with an ex is not an easy process, especially if communication is rocky at best. It's not an impossible process - people do it every day. Think out a plan with varying steps along the way. Every time you reach a milestone, take a moment to consider your progress. That way you can focus on the things that seem to be working while eliminating the pieces that are less productive overall. If you're willing to be patient and put in the work, you have every chance of winning your ex back to your side of things - especially if you can correctly interpret their reactions to your efforts and use that knowledge to your continued advantage.

What To Do Next

When your ex is ignoring you it can be like a kick in the stomach. There are things that you can do now to reverse this situation and make your ex contact you. It all centres on understanding human psychology and what makes people tick.

You should also be avoiding these break up mistakes if you want your ex to desire you again. We all do a lot of things subconsciously that are highly unattractive. Don't let your ex see you in a negative light.

Perhaps you are curious about how your ex really feels about you? In that case you should be on the look out for signs they still love you. Tune into their body language and decipher what they say.