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jumping to conclusions
solid foundation
text messages
assumptions
motivation
silence
texts
relationship
My Ex Is Still Texting Me After The Break Up - What Does It Mean?
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My Ex Is Still Texting Me After The Break Up  -  What Does It Mean?

"My ex is still texting me" is a common statement after a break up. There are many reasons for this, some might be more innocent than others, but all you really want to do is to get inside your ex's head and work out what their intentions are. This article aims to shed a little light on their reasons.

In modern society, texting has become the easiest and most convenient way to keep in touch. It's possible that you and your ex have sent each other thousands of texts throughout the time that you spent in a relationship together.

Now your ex has broken up with you, and you started to get the impression that you took all of that continual contact for granted. You completely expected that as soon as the relationship stopped, the texting would stop along with it. In fact, you tried to prepare yourself for the silence - and that preparation seemed to be unnecessary. You were surprised to receive texts from your ex - even after the breakup.

Is it normal for an ex to continue conversation - even after they've broken up with you? Are they just trying to figure out how you are and how you're handling things, or is there something happening beneath the surface? How can you tell the difference between an innocent, simple text - and one that could carry some hidden meaning?

What Is Your Ex's Motivation?

The first thing you have to realize is that telling the difference is unnecessary. There are no "innocent" text messages after a breakup. If your ex is messaging you, then there is more to their current mental state than meets the eye. If your ex has progressed beyond simply thinking about you to taking action to actually reach out, they have something on their mind.

Don't be guilty of the same kinds of assumptions, however. You'll want to watch out for the dangers of jumping to conclusions before you have a solid foundation to land on. Just because your ex is initiating contact doesn't mean that they're ready to get back together.

While it could indicate that they're starting to weigh things out internally, it could be that they're just feeling particularly lonely at the time. This is when you need to put your investigative hat on - and try to figure out the underlying issues that are happening beneath the surface.

The one thing you shouldn't expect to happen is a concrete explanation from your ex that thoroughly lays out their reasons for reaching out. In fact, you should be prepared for a lot of excuses. They may have prepared themselves for some inquisitiveness after contact is established - and they have a whole laundry list of excuses ready to go if you start to question their motives.

There are a few assumptions that it is safe to make -regardless of any lingering issues. The first thing you have to understand is that your ex is missing you. The second thing you have to do is accept the fact that reaching out to you post-breakup wasn't really easy for your ex.

In fact, they had to make the willful and intentional decision to pick up their phone and send that message. It takes a lot of guts to make such a big move - and it means that your ex has been thinking of you on a much deeper level than you may have initially realized.

One of A Kind Or Repeat Offender?

While it's true that no text from an ex is purely "innocent", there are some justifiable reasons why they could have texted. Breakups leave behind some dangling threads. Sometimes you have stuff at your ex's house. Sometimes they have accidentally left some things behind, and they're fully justified in trying to reclaim their belongings.

Other times, it's normal for an ex to have to ask a question or get clarification about something that took place during the relationship. If your ex's contact is genuine, you may only get one or two sporadic messages, and that kind of message should be taken at face-value.

If their text messages are more consistent, however, then you can feel assured that there's more than meets the eye. Any kind of questions from your ex about your life, your schedule or your feelings are often leading in nature, and they often mean that your ex is trying to discern where you stand in case they want to try and win you back.

If your ex seems overly polite or even flirts with you via messaging, it's a good sign that the breakup is headed towards reconsideration. They're not sure of what they're after - and they're taking the appropriate steps to try and resolve their residual issues prior to making a move.

What is The Timetable?

If most of the texts are sent during the evening, it's likely that your ex is remembering all the positive time that you and your ex used to spend together. It's also possible that they're lonely, and they're reaching out to the person who they're used to sharing their evenings with.

If your ex is texting you on the weekends, it's possible that they're trying to reassure themselves that they're happy with their new single life. It isn't really about you - it's about them. They feel insecure, and they're not certain that they'll successfully be able to move forward alone, so they reach out and tell you what a great time they're having - when the truth could be anything but.

If your ex is still texting you while they're out and about that instantly make you feel queasy - like talking about someone new or reaching out when they're drunk or at a club, don't throw your phone against the wall in a fit of jealous rage. It doesn't mean that they're moving on as they're typing out the message. It means that they're looking to get a reaction of jealousy or anger on your part.

By not giving them that reaction, their ego is going to continue teetering and they'll eventually be forced to come to a decision on where they want to go and what they ultimately want to accomplish in regards to you moving forward.

What Can You Do in Regards to a Response?

Ironically, if you're looking to take action, often the best action to take is to do nothing. If you respond to all of their messages immediately, you convey loud and clear that you're still hung up on them and your former relationship, and your ex could get the reassurance that they're looking for - and leave you behind all over again.

If you're hoping to get back together, you don't want to give your ex any reason to label you as desperate, clingy or needy and you don't want to have to rely on texts to make your move. You want a lot more than a text to make your case for reconciliation and you need to have a plan in place to make your goals possible. If you can prepare yourself in advance and have a handle on what to do, when to do it and what to say, you can start to move the process forward - and set yourself up in the best position possible.

What's Next ?

Now that you know better why your ex could be texting you, it is time to do something about it. Do you want to encourage more communication from your ex and ultimately win back your ex? If so you need to pay attention to key psychological strategies that will work on them that are specific to males and females.

First, you need to grasp what is the proper contact with your ex to make them desire you and want to pursue you again. Then you need to make sure that you avoid the most embarrassing break up mistakes that will make your ex un-attracted to you.


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