This Article is About
gut instinct
jumping to conclusions
thoughts and feelings
breakups
frame of mind
best interest
obstacles
point of view
emotions
choices
perspective
My Ex Isn't Speaking To Me - Why?
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My Ex Isn\'t Speaking To Me  -  Why?

Communication is the key to all relationships - even ones that have unfortunately come to an end. If you're set on trying to win back an ex but you find that communication seems to be impossible, you don't have to lose hope. Even the most difficult obstacles along the way can be overcome with the right set of tools at your disposal.

If the end of your relationship proved overwhelming for you, it was probably similarly so for your ex. That means that some space is in order -for both of you. Don't just assume the worst because you're finding it hard to get in touch. Simply try to relax and think clearly instead of jumping to conclusions because answers are not forthcoming.

Making the Best Choices After a Breakup:

Instead of handling things from a reactionary point of view, try changing your perspective. Not only do you want to take your own thoughts and feelings into account, you want to consider the thoughts and feelings of your ex as well. If you want to genuinely rebuild your relationship, you need to approach the situation as impartially as you can. You want to avoid some common mistakes while simultaneously acting in a proactive, positive manner. The following tools can increase your chances of success and limit potential pitfalls along the path.

1. Don't Try to Chase them Down

The more you insist upon running after your ex, the more they're going to want to run. You're going to want to avoid this as much as possible, even if that means taking some time away from them, and giving them some space. It may seem contrary to everything your gut instinct is telling you, but it's going to be in your best interest when you examine the big picture.

2. Don't Allow the Negativity Rule your Emotions

Breakups are depressing, and it's simply a fact of life. On the other hand, people handle them all the time. It's not easy to pick yourself up and give it another go, but it is something that must be done, regardless. Things worth doing are rarely easy to accomplish. A positive frame of mind may not be easy to accomplish, but it's something that will not only improve your attractiveness but also boost your already-damaged self-esteem.

3. Go Do Something

Instead of succumbing to the urge to lay in bed, get out of the house and do something active. Physical activity is a natural mood enhancer, and enjoying an active social life after experiencing a breakup can do wonders for your esteem. Just imagine how your ex will see this abrupt change of plans. They're going to realize that they may risk losing you completely, and that's probably not what they had in mind.

4. Examine Your Room for Growth

Everyone has some areas that need some work along the road. People change along with the times, and not all of those changes are positive. Now is a golden opportunity to consider how you've changed throughout the course of your relationship and use that to improve.

Consider your Ex's Avoidance - Why Is It Happening?

If your ex abruptly cut off communication, it's usually due to a specific reason. In the case of breakups, either they felt as if your attempts at contact were too much - or they were too soon. Either way, the best way to overcome the obstacle they've thrown in your path is to give them what they want - or at least what they think they want. Stepping back from the heat of the situation can work to your advantage. They'll start to realize that they miss you, and you're nowhere to be found. Not only are you making them curious, you'll make them a lot more willing to talk when the time comes.

Getting an ex back is a multi-faceted process that isn't as easy as just saying a few words and winning them over. If it were that easy, everyone would reconnect with their ex, and no breakup would stick. Unfortunately, that's not the case. That doesn't mean that all hope is lost - far from it. By creating and maintaining a careful plan of attack, you can win your ex back by seeing things from their point of view. Using these techniques wisely can enhance your efforts and move you forward in the process while appealing to their reason - and they won't even see it coming.

What To Do Next

Being dumped is a heart shattering experience. That said, you will have to come to terms with it in order to reverse it. Now is the time when you need to be proactive, you need to gain the knowledge necessary to achieve your goal - winning your ex back.

One of the most important things that you need to focus on right now is contact with your ex. Knowing how to manage contact is a big part of the battle.


Street Talk

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