This Article is About
male counterpart
physical illnesses
true feelings
communication barriers
positive attitude
positivity
first move
deep breath
fiance
right direction
obstacles
patience
discipline
depression
Staying Positive With Him
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Staying Positive With Him

There are several reasons why staying positive with him, (your boyfriend, husband, fiance) will benefit you. You can take your relationship to a whole new level by simply utilizing some of these strategies...

We all know stress can cause damage to your internal AND external system. Stress can lead to depression and be the cause of some physical illnesses as well.

If you find yourself arguing with your male counterpart on a regular basis, you may want to re-examine the type of communication barriers you are having . It takes time , patience, and a little discipline in training yourself to keep an upbeat, positive attitude toward your other half.

The first thing you can do each day when waking up is to tell yourself this is going to be a productive day and whatever obstacles that may come your way will only benefit you by showing you some pretty valuable life lessons.

Learn to express your feelings with your partner instead of snapping, judging, and blaming. If your partner communicates with you in a way that upsets you, try expressing those disappointing feelings to him and communicate to him how he can speak to you about it next time that would make you feel better. Believe it or not, men are turned on when a woman is capable of being honest with her true feelings.

This can be a difficult task if you and your partner are used to snapping at each other. It takes a big person to make the first move in the right direction, but you will see the positive effects of this almost immediately.

The next time your boyfriend says something that makes you uneasy, stop, take a deep breath, and THINK before reacting. Think about communicating in a way that does not blame him for anything. Always try to say something kind in each conversation you have. That is key.

The more positivity and love you project toward your significant other, the more you will receive. It is a learning and growing process, but remember that you have the power to steer your relationships in a direction that is more beneficial to your life.

When your man is being funny, laugh out loud. Appreciate his humor, don't speak badly of him to others. It creates terrible tension in a relationship and will make him feel bad about himself. Also do not try and change him. All these things can make it hard to live in a positive environment with him.

If mistakes were made on your part, apologize sincerely and don't just show him respect, TELL him how much you appreciate and respect when he does this or that. This will make him feel good about himself and want to continue with positive and good behavior He will appreciate this and you will see him putting that extra effort into making you happy as well.

Sometimes you have to step up to the plate and be the bigger "man" , but the benefits you will reap are priceless, and you will experience an overall emotional and physical well being as well as more success in general coming your way. You will see opportunities in life coming your way you've never seen before. So put these tips into action and watch you and your honey be the best you two can be!


Street Talk

To All...and namely a very spirited Aloha Kakahiaka to you, my friend, the Lovely Wiliah... My entirety of work depends on clear communication, and regardless of what it is that I am trying to get across to anyone, if my words are not clear to them, they will not understand. There is no better place to know that this phenomena exists than in a romance. Men, by and large, are blamed for many things that go wrong in a relationship, but where does the onus on our part start? We want badly to not be the princess, but more than that, we fear the reality that we have in front of us. The reality in front of us could be the starkly different "thing" that is bringing about the energy of a lack of clarity to any relationship, but the Love relationship is where it can be the most frustrating. We learn MANY lessons from the things that are presented to us through other people, and no better mirror have we than that of our very betrothed. In them we see that which is the goodness in us, and further, more importantly, that which are the things that we do not care to see or to look at, that which we deem as being not that great. Thing is, though, if we do not bother to look at those things, we can no longer point them out in others until we are willingly ready to accept them in ourselves. Once it is that we have been able to do this much, the ability to be empathic about things becomes the strongest thing within us that prompts us to become more communication oriented. It is at this point where we realize that maybe, just maybe, we are not the ones who needs to keep it positive for HIM but rather and only ourselves. Too often we are taking the responsibility of other peoples' happiness as being our own to carry for them, but that belongs to them, and the ONLY reason that we should change a thing about us is when it will benefit us AND them. Women, I find, are more inclined to give away our power, our source of who we really are, all to keep one other person happy, at which point the question of when the other party becomes responsible for their own happiness comes into play, and more, the question, too, of why it is that we think we have to change to make them happy when the possibility of them NOT changing is greater. Why is it that we must change for anyone escapes me, and while I have been a big sinner in the church called "I will make you happy and be all that you need in Life," through being that way, even as I am getting better at not being that way, what that energy brings to us is yet one more weight to carry for someone else, because at that point we really are not trying to keep ourselves happy and sane. We are, instead, racking our brains and wrecking our nerves trying everything possible to keep someone who is just plain unhappy all the way around, happy. And this leads to our being miserable, which leads to our believing that what we are feeling they are also feeling, and this might be the case and also might be the very thing making them unhappy, it does not have to be the reality. When it is that the reality and the energy behind our acceptance of that reality merge and we can hover away from, even for a moment, our pain, this is when we "get it." This is called empathy, where we can look at someone else and say that we "get it" in terms of what they are going through and can be truly empathic toward their issues. Once it is that we can listen to them and hear what they are saying and not what we want to hear, this is when real communication begins - when we can listen to the message and not only the blah blah blah and only what we want to hear of what they are saying, when we can understand and relate to the issues they are going through, not only from our own point of view but also, try a little bit to really put ourselves in their places- THAT is when the positive light that IS who we are can shine brightly through us. And unlike much else, that light of positivity can never be hidden, and yes, of course, it is what the love in our lives see most and apparently because it is what drew them to us in the first place. And of course, Lovely One, you may feel free to quote me...Aloha !! Reverend Roxie

Reply
  about 7 years ago

Hi Wallah I have just finished reading your article and I am impressed by its rich content. I have also read your profile and sound like you can be a very good marriage and family therapist. However I was not sure about what you are promoting in your website I wish you well in your long journey to the Internet marketing Thank you

Reply
  about 7 years ago
  

Hi Geoffrey, thanks for the feedback. Pertaining to your question about the website... basically i would like to help women better understand the male psyche, and to educate them on the drastic differences between the way a male uses communication vs. the way a woman does. In a nutshell, women seek out emotional engagement through communication to feel loved, and men seek out praise for thier "good-doings". When neither party receives these things, the women feel unloved and the men can feel emasculated. If both parties had a better understanding of what each other needed to feel loved, there would be alot less separations. Of course there is alot more detail to this theory which i will expand on as the website grows and future articles are published....thank you for taking an interest...let me know if i can help with any future " lover's quarrels".....Wiliah

Reply
  about 7 years ago

Hi Wallah, My wish to you is a very good morning and the next parts of the day Do you think that marriage and relationship business should be a course that should be taught in college? I realize that there are many broken families and divorces and all that was required was information of how man and woman operate and how to handle each other

  
  about 7 years ago
  

Very much so! It should be taught! But then they couldn't charge you $130 an hr. for counceling...lol. Communication is what should be taught specifically because of the major differences in communication between the two sexes. I hope you have a wonderful Valentines day and i very much apprreciated your article on men and diabetes...it can cause impotence?? OH NO!

  
  about 7 years ago
  

Anybody having any communication problems with boyfriend?

Reply
  about 7 years ago
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