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What To Say To My Ex Boyfriend To Get Him Back
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What To Say To My Ex Boyfriend To Get Him Back

Thinking about what to say to your ex boyfriend to get him back? You've probably been confronted with a list a mile long of things that you should never come out of your mouth if you're trying to get back together with an ex-boyfriend. The list of things that you can say seems significantly shorter - if it exists at all. If you find yourself at a loss when the phone finally rings, don't give up. There are ways that you can communicate effectively to fix even the most broken of relationships. Knowing what to do and say now is critical - so make sure you're aware of your best options before saying something you'll later come to regret.

Part of that process means ridding yourself of any potentially negative feelings that are lingering post-breakup. Granted, it's not as simple as waving a magic wand and expecting your hurt feelings to be wiped away. This is where a lot of the hard work comes in. If you didn't sincerely love this guy, you wouldn't want to get back together. That means that his positive attributes outweigh the negatives and you're willing to look past what happened to rebuild a new relationship. By undergoing a change in perspective, you're eliminating the risk that your ex can pick up on any minute inflections or pointed words that could prove that you're not over the breakup - and ruin your chance of success.

After a long, arduous process of self-examination and reconstruction, the person that you present to the world is going to be dramatically different than the one that wanted to do nothing more than sit on the couch and eat truffles. It may seem like no one will notice, but the truth is everyone will, including your ex-boyfriend. You're not giving in to the overwhelming urge to retreat into despair - you're doing the opposite. When people don't conform to common expectations, it makes a huge difference. Congratulate yourself on a job well done so far, and enjoy all the attention you'll be getting.

Eventually, his curiosity is going to get the best of him and he's going to try to establish contact. He may do this under the radar by sneaking in a text or two or sending a quick email. It is crucial that you not respond - even if you're sorely tempted to. It's only by actually calling and putting himself on the line that you can encourage the process to continue. Otherwise, he gets the easy way out and you're left wondering what went wrong. Make sure that you've had a decent amount of time apart - a few days aren't going to be enough. Try for a few weeks and then see what he does. If you jump on the phone call like a pouncing animal, he's going to run away faster than ever. Make sure you're anticipating his call so you don't sound over-eager.

Talking on the phone is like second nature to you, yet when your ex finally dials your number your mind goes into a tail spin. Your hands are shaking, your mouth is dry and you have no clue what you should be doing or saying. The good news is coming up with something to say doesn't fall on your shoulders. Your ex called YOU, which means he wanted to talk to you. You don't have to provide the conversation, just participate in it. Regardless of the topic, make sure it stays casual and noncommittal. Overall, portray the impression that you're in the middle of something, which allows the conversation to remain brief.

Brevity is the ultimate rule in this first conversation. By brief, you should be prepared for a conversation lasting no more than a few minutes. If you are confused about what to say to your ex boyfriend, affirm that it's good to hear from him and let him provide whatever small talk he deems fit. After a few moments when the conversation seems to die out, end the call before any awkward silences can take place. Tell your ex that although it was nice to talk, you're on your way out the door and let him go.

With a conversation this short, don't set your expectations too high. He's not going to come out and express his undying love within that five minute call - and you shouldn't expect him to. You can expect that he's going to call again and you need to know what to say to ex boyfriend. He may even ask about calling again before you hang up. If he does, agree to his proposition, but let him make the details. If he goes so far as to ask what your plans are, tell him something believable but vague. Instead of sitting on the couch over-analyzing the conversation endlessly, treat yourself to something fun afterwards. It will help you process the situation and gear you up for the next time you talk.

Your Next Steps

First of all you need to be aware of the no contact rule and how important this is to get right if you want to get your ex boyfriend back. Knowing the ins and outs of this will enable you to know when and how to contact him to increase desire and make him miss you. You also have to be aware of these break up mistakes and make sure that you don't commit any of them if you are to make him see you positively.


Street Talk

Palsnett  

Nice article! In my case, I never thought to go back with him, so thar situation gave me the opportunity to get out of my comfort zone, love me more and meet my future husband ;)

Reply
  about 5 years ago
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