Why We Should Rethink The Way We Live In Our Quest For Happiness
Join 1000's of Authors at StreetArticles Today!

Why We Should Rethink the Way We Live In Our Quest for Happiness

If you go around Singapore today to interview youngsters about their aspirations, chances are their response would be to get a good job, a house and a car, perhaps retired their parents and then give back to society.

Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with such goals. However, in doing so, have we actually considered what this path will lead us to? What do we actually desire in life? We often over-work, fueled by our own perception of where our family’s interests lie, but have we stopped to consider what they actually need?

Financial Independence is important but it is not the end, but a means to an end

Many of us are convinced by surrounding influences such as society, parents and culture that this is the most appropriate path to let our families lead a comfortable life and assume that it will eventually allow us to find happiness. Our ultimate goal is to seek financial freedom and we work hard to achieve that.

Yet, how exactly do we measure financial freedom? Should we measure it by absolute or relative terms? The thing is people tend to compare. By setting an extrinsic motivator as a goal, will you be satisfied when you have reached it? Or will you be envious of the friend who recently bought a bungalow which puts your flat to shame? Or as cost of living increases, You readjust the bar upwards such that it becomes an endless pursuit? Will you neglect other more important things in life in the process? What happens if you fail? Work even harder? These are questions we have to ask ourselves before blindly pursuing society’s defined notion of success.

What do our loved ones actually need?

Often, we work hard to liberate our parents from their jobs or provide for our children. It pains me to see my parents working so hard. However, we need to be careful not to neglect them in the pursuit of financial freedom, other it is self-defeating.

We have to understand our parents’ true needs and adjust our actions accordingly. That does not mean simply doing what our parents want but using our observance and inferential skills to frame their problems accurately and coming up with appropriate solutions to tackle them.

For instance, my parents tell me that they don’t mind me pursuing what I like to do as long as I can provide for my family. This suggests that they are contented as long as they are able to lead comfortable enough lives and I have the heart to continue caring for them. As a result, I know they do not desire luxurious lives and treasure relationships more and will probably make them happier by being present for them, insteading of spending most of my time working.

Beyond that, you have to evaluate your solutions and consider their implications. By retiring your parents, you could potentially take away something that has been integral in their lives. Without their jobs, they may be at a loss of what to do and could potentially lose their purpose in life. What I seek then is not total financial freedom, but to make my parents happier and work less hard. I aim to do so, by getting them to redirect their goals from being extrinsic(financial freedom) towards intrinsic(being contented with what we have and appreciate the world more).

Our quest for happiness

Many of the happiest people in the world are contented with what they have, although they may not have the highest standard of living or best living conditions. By putting happiness as our life goal, we tend to appreciate things around us more, and enjoy the beauty of life, and naturally be happier.

With an extrinsic motivator such as financial freedom, even if we manage to to achieve it, it is likely to be at the expense of others. In traditional markets, if we all achieve financial freedom, who will do the lower-end jobs for us? Extrinsic motivation thus sets the stage for competition where there are limited spaces for such rewards, where some fall back on the corporate ladder, potentially breeding greater inequality. This could be a contributing factor as to why companies and the army are somewhat hesitant in sending their employees for higher education in fear that they would jump to brighter prospects outside.

A simple framework to redirect our path leading to a dead end towards a path full of hope

That being said, our quest for happiness may seem complicated and abstract. However, I believe that simply by empathizing and then giving, we can better understand problems and appreciate the things around us. By putting ourselves in others’ perspectives, we also open our minds and become more understanding of others’ issues and be more patient when things don’t go our way. Giving then expresses our empathy, appreciation and love for others, by coming up with appropriate solutions to help solve or at least alleviate their problems. For me, knowing that I had positively impacted others’ lives brings meaning and therefore happiness into my life.Loving Parents

It can be simple. From mopping the floor for my mum to adding funny little icons such as heart shapes to the family photo to appreciate your loved ones, I believe that happiness comes with the little joys in life.

I believe that the perfect representation to capture this essence of empathizing and giving is personalized gifts. We all give gifts, but over time, it has become more of an obliged practice, rather than the expression of appreciation. By adding the “personalized” element of understanding others’ needs when giving, I believe we can relive the meaningful practice of giving and spread greater happiness and positivity in our society.

If interested to find more about how to build meaningful relationships, please click here.


Street Talk

No comments present
You May Also Like
How to Get A Woman to Love You
It’s not as hard as you think. You can learn how to get a woman to love you, by simply learning the art of buying flowers for women, would definitely ensure your esteem in their eyes and ultimately seal the deal. Letting a woman know how much you care for…
By: Afees Alli in  Relationships  >  Communication   May 20, 2016  
0
  Likes: 0

What To Say To Your Ex Boyfriend - Leave Him Wanting More!
You've been coming up with lists of things that you want to say to your ex boyfriend ever since you broke up. When the time actually comes, however, you seem to be stumbling over your words and every thought you had went flying out the window. Instead of hanging up…
By: Charlotte Jane in  Relationships  >  Communication   Sep 15, 2012  
0
  Likes: 0

How To Seriously Impress Your Lover’s Parents
When a serious relationship goes a step further and when you begin to talk marriage, meeting the parents of your partner becomes obvious. As important as it is to meet the parents, it is just as scary. You can be all nerves and sweat trying to make impress the parents1…
By: niks1 in  Relationships  >  Communication   Jan 21, 2016  
0
  Likes: 0

How can I tell him its Over? Express yourself through Music
The sounds of Music do more than just make you move on the dance floor. The various sounds, rhythms, and beats music transcends can help someone express the way they feel or simply communicate your most hidden secrets.
By: Mike4 in  Relationships  >  Communication   Feb 12, 2011  
0
  Likes: 0

How To Save Your Relationship
Separation is difficult for everybody. If you really want to keep your relationship then the smartest thing is to prevent the separation firsthand. Preventing a breakup will save the couple heartbreak and the extended process of healing and reconciliation. More significantly, it can assist in avoiding a lot of harming…
By: karen13 in  Relationships  >  Communication   Oct 27, 2013  
0
  Likes: 0

What's it All About?
So, I ask the question but I don't have an answer. It seems as though my writing comes in bursts. I write for my local paper, the Sisters Nugget. It is a weekly that comes out every Wednesday. I mainly cover music events, some sports, and whatever else I dig…
By: Jim Williams in  Relationships  >  Communication   Sep 14, 2012  
0
  Likes: 0

Ways To Tease A Man
Flirting came easy at the beginning you began dating. Just about all words you articulated, bat of your eyelashes and tilt of your head was some sort of flirting. Whether your purpose was some kind of subtle enticement or absolute playfulness, flirtation was the communication of the day, and what…
By: karen13 in  Relationships  >  Communication   Nov 24, 2013  
0
  Likes: 0

How To Handle Communication Breakdowns – When To Stop Trying To Persuade Another
Effective communication can be the bridge between what you want and receiving it. There are many ways to communicate. In the workplace and in your personal life, how skillfully you communicate very likely determines how much satisfaction you experience in your relationships. In conflict, our communication skills are really put…
By: Bob Lancer in  Relationships  >  Communication   Jan 24, 2012  
0
  Likes: 2

Freedom Of Speech
A contact was telling me about a football game and using the “f” word two or three times every sentence.I requested that he toned it down a bit to which he responded “Get with it Alf this is normal language today,everyone speaks this way “.This statement started a train of…
By: Alfred Powell in  Relationships  >  Communication   Dec 07, 2011  
0
  Likes: 1

The Best Way to Attract Beautiful Women
The issue on the best ways to draw in females remains on the minds of so many guys. It can be ravaging when attempting to obtain a women interest and all that is occurring is that she can hardly hear you nor see you. Every effort you have actually put…
By: Deric pol in  Relationships  >  Communication   Apr 15, 2015  
0
  Likes: 0

How To Get Back With An Ex Girlfriend
In love and war all is fair. Trust me, it surely feels like warfare when love is on the skids. Everybody knows that the most definite of victors in any war is the army with fantastic power and solid strategies. When the warfare is for somebody who has taken her…
By: karen13 in  Relationships  >  Communication   Dec 23, 2013  
0
  Likes: 0

He Said, She Heard
I have always been fascinated by the differences in which men and women communicate with each other. Women often seem to assume some sort of disconnect between what men say and what they actually mean. But men really are much simpler than that. If there are any ladies reading this,…
By: Steve McWilliams in  Relationships  >  Communication   Aug 16, 2013  
0
  Likes: 0

How Can Better Communication Save My Relationship?
You want to save your relationship. You've been told that learning to communicate better with your girlfriend is the perfect start. But, how can better communication save your relationship? It sounds like an explanation that is way too simplistic to be real. Wouldn't it take something so much more than…
By: T Dub Jackson in  Relationships  >  Communication   May 23, 2011  
0
  Likes: 1

7 Signs That Show He’s Flirting With You
Ladies, I think it’s fair to say that sometimes it can be really difficult to gauge if a guy is flirting with us, or simply being polite. I have to admit, it has happened to me on a few occasions, that I’ve met this really cute guy who seemed interested…
By: niks1 in  Relationships  >  Communication   Jun 03, 2015  
0
  Likes: 0

Why Do Men Leave Relationships?
After a dissolution, ladies are frequently left emotionally destroyed and brokenhearted because they merely do not realize the reason the male they had been seeing could just departed. To acquire a better perception of why guys go out of relations, take the next grounds into account. - Communication: Healthy and…
By: karen13 in  Relationships  >  Communication   Feb 07, 2014  
0
  Likes: 0

Article Views: 977    Report this Article