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Ex Doesn't Want To Talk To Me - Why?
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Ex Doesn\'t Want To Talk To Me  -  Why?

Ex doesn't want to talk to me, why? Your ex not talking to you isn't what you wanted or expected to happen. You probably knew that things between you would be a little awkward after the break up but you hoped against hope that you could overcome this and maintain a semblance of a friendship. You were probably aware that you wouldn't be as close as you used to be, but not talking to each other completely wasn't on the cards. Unfortunately for you this didn't happen and you need to know why.

Try To See Things From Your Ex's Perspective

The reasons that your ex isn't talking to you right now escape you, but your ex thinks that this is justified. Your ex isn't going to tell you either why they have suddenly pressed the mute button on your relationship - they aren't talking to you remember? It is time to do a little digging yourself and come up with the reasons why your ex isn't talking to you. Only then will you gain the upper hand again, be able to put things right and encourage conversation between you and your ex.

It is vital that you realise that your ex doesn't necessarily hate you because they refuse to speak to you. It is a lot more complicated than that. Your ex will be behaving in a predefined way after the break up and you need to anticipate this. This is where human psychology comes in. If you can understand why your ex feels the way that they do and see things from their perspective, it will all become clear to you.

People have problems doing this though. After a break up tensions and emotions are at an all time high. It is human nature to constantly think about how the break up has affected only us and how we are feeling. Little to no thought goes into seeing things the way that our ex sees them. This is the problem. If you really want your ex to talk to you again and build a positive friendship or new relationship out of the rubble of your break up, you need to walk in their shoes for a while. Only then can you truly understand why your ex doesn't want to talk to you.

It is easy to misinterpret your ex's behaviour and get paranoid and hurt because of it. Just because your ex isn't talking to you, it doesn't mean that they don't care or that their feelings have disappeared. It is quite the opposite in fact as you will see when you read the rest of this article.

There is no one size fits all solution to your ex's refusal to speak to you. Every relationship is different and failed for varying reasons. Maybe your break up was filled with animosity because you did something terrible like cheating. In this case you should have expected your ex to ignore you at the very least. Maybe everything was going well post break up but suddenly your ex just disappeared from your life without an explanation. Whatever the case is, there are powerful reasons as to why your ex is behaving this way - understanding these is the key to making your ex open up and want to engage with you again.

Your Ex Doesn't Want To Talk To You Because They Are Hurt

Has this already crossed your mind? It is a very common reason for why your ex isn't talking to you. After a break up your ex could be suffering a lot more than you think. Sure they may have said that they were fine with the break up and that they are happy to be single. This isn't necessarily the case though. Your ex will say a lot of things to save further embarrassment and to stop them being vulnerable in front of you. It is all pretense because they don't want you to feel sorry for them - that would just make them feel even more pathetic.

Stop and think about this for a second. Your ex is probably finding the whole break up just as hard as you, if not more. Outwardly they act as if you don't matter and ignoring you is a great message to send to you. Your ex may also be feeling confused about their feelings and are trying to process them without any interference from your end.

The break up and you ended up hurting your ex and consequently they want to remove themselves from you completely. They know that you have the potential to hurt them again so they stay away to protect themselves. Even talking to you will send out huge alarms to your ex because they know that anything you say could plunge them back into despair. It is much safer for them to ignore you completely if they are hurting.

When you call or email your ex during this stage it will only get their guard up and make them paranoid of you playing with their emotions and using mind games to get at them. It is best for you to back off for a while and give them the space that they need to process their feelings towards you. Just because your ex doesn't want to talk to you, it doesn't always mean that they are over you or that they hate you, it could just be their only coping mechanism right now - they don't know what else to do.

The fact that your ex is hurt after a break up is actually a good sign for you if you want to get them back. It shows that they still have feelings for you and are conflicted about what to do for the best. Don't take their no contact as a sign of disinterest straight away - breaking up is a complicated and confusing process.

Your Next Steps

There are many more reasons why your ex won't talk to you after the break up. To really get to the heart of the matter you must understand human psychology and why people act defensively after a break up. First though you have to be honest with yourself. Look out for signs ex is over you before you start trying to win your ex back. There is no point in making a fool of yourself if your ex has genuinely moved on.

Then you need to use contact to your advantage to make your ex actually want to speak to you again. When you use powerful contact with ex strategies your situation can turn around drastically and your ex could be the one that initiates contact and makes the effort with you.


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