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Five Ways To Have A Fair Argument
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This may sound strange but there are ways to have a fair argument. There are going to be times in your life when you don't always agree with someone or they don't agree with you, how ever you want to see it. When you argue a point you are basically trying to get someone to see your point of view, possibly even get them to change the way they think about something, and the same goes for the other person.

When two people don't see things the same way it will cause undo stress in the relationship. No matter who it is with, family, work, neighbors, or church. It also causes stress for the others who may be involved as well.

There are people in the world who do like to argue their point and don't care what anyone thinks or to change how they may think- that is a whole separate topic. These people are just looking to win and don't really care what the cost may be. They have a point to prove and they are going to prove it. But you don't really gain anything by being that way, do you really?

These are what I think some of the best techniques to be as fair as possible:

1. Listen and really hear what the other person is saying. Once you do that no matter how hard it may be to hear you can tell them how you feel or your side of the situation. Often times we hear but we don't really listen or comprehend what is being told to us because we have closed off our minds to what they are saying.

2. Remain calm as possible. Sometimes it is easier said then done. Just because they may get out of control does not mean you have to. There may be a time or two where you feel like you need to raise your voice, but for the most part a calm even tone gets the point across just the same or even better.

3, Focus on the issue at hand. Don't bring up past issues that will only make the argument last longer. If the other person does this don't fall into that trap, and let them know also. If you or they have an issue with something form the past it needs to be resolved at another time,unless that is part of what the argument is about.

4. Give them your full attention. Eliminate as many distractions as possible, TV, phone, other people. When you give someone your full attention, no matter how mad they may be they may not be as aggressive because they see how intent you are in hearing what they have to say and it may make it move a lot smoother to a positive outcome. Poor body language and inattentiveness will just make them more angry.

5. Never attack someone. Let them know you have something to discuss with them. No one likes to be attacked and they will usually react one of two ways, they will attack back or they will just shut down and take it. Your words will have no meaning to them and nothing will be resolved.

There are many other things you can do to make the argument as fair as possible for both parties. But no matter how fair it may be the issue may not be resolved. In this case there must be some type of compromise made between the two people and have some type of peace. Whether you get your way or get your point across the outcome should never be just to win. The objective should be to listen, be heard, and come to some resolve. Also to learn that there may be some arguments you won't win no matter how fair you try and argue your point.


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