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Have You Gone Through A Truly Awful Breakup? How You Can Still Get Your Ex Back
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Have You Gone Through A Truly Awful Breakup? How You Can Still Get Your Ex Back

No matter how badly things went wrong between you, there is always the chance that you can get your ex back. It’s a sad fact that people in love do terrible things that break hearts, but you CAN find your way back from heartbreak. Lots of people do just that – every day.

If you have just broken up then you will be feeling pretty bad right now – especially if the breakup wasn’t your idea. You are probably feeling panicky – and desperate as well – at the loss of your ex, and you really want to get them back. The good news is that this is completely possible, but the bad news is that it won’t be easy or quick.

First off, though, there are some things you need to do. Most of them go against your instincts and will not be easy. Give them a go though – suspend your judgement and try them out.

Accept your share of the blame. You probably feel that it wasn’t your fault that the two of you have broken up, especially if it wasn’t your idea. But it takes two people to make a relationship work, and whether things go well or badly, both are contributors to the result. Show your maturity by acknowledging that you made mistakes that you now regret. Refusing to point the finger will send a powerful message to your ex, and will show your strength and integrity. These are very attractive and desirable qualities in a partner; and your ex will be surprised and impressed. But don’t try to take the blame for more than your share in the hope that this will bring your ex back. Overdoing your part in sharing the blame will make you look desperate, not strong.

Focus on the future. You need to try to be positive, and the only way to do that is to think of the future. You want to get your ex back, and you are working to make that happen. Keep your thoughts focused on this, and try not to dwell on the breakup. Constantly thinking about all the things you wish you had done differently will not help you now. Concentrate on things that will benefit you and lift your spirits, such as your friends, family and keeping yourself in shape. Keep your mental attitude positive by being optimistic for the future. Start to move on with your life. This will send a powerful message to your ex that will force them to think about whether they have done the right thing.

Believe that you can get them back. Without this belief you will not be able to put in the mental effort and self discipline you need to get back with your ex. In order to get them back, you need first to let them go. Unless they feel you moving on – and therefore away – from them, you will not awaken the fear of loss in them. It is this fear that will make them miss you and want to get back together with you. People always want what they cannot have. This is a powerful weapon that you need to make full use of now.

It need not be the end of the road for your relationship. Many thousands of couples split up, but end up getting back together. Like you they thought it was all over, and that there was no hope for the future. But they found a way back; and you can too. And at the same time you can learn and grow from your mistakes, and become a better and happier person too.

Image credit: Katie Tegtmeyer's photostream at flickr


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