Few things are as bad as being stuck in a post-breakup limbo. Splitting up is traumatic enough itself, and can leave everyone involved unable to think straight for days, if not weeks, afterward. Ironically, the time when you're most likely to be saying “I want him back” is also the time you're the least well-equipped to answer “What can I do to get him back?”

The good news is that that's okay. As long as you can resist the temptation to contact him when you're likely to say something you'll regret, you can can turn “I want him back” into “I have him back.” The only thing you need to remember to do is to behave the opposite way that you're probably feeling.

Why should you try to avoid acting the way you feel? After all, if your ex ever wanted you, he'd see how much pain he put you through and want to come back, right? Though that argument makes sense, human nature makes it untrue.

People, including your ex, like to be around happy people that make them feel good. In this case, the last thing you want to do is show your ex how much hurt you're feeling, because he'll associate interacting with you with feelings of guilt and pain.

“So, what can I do to get him back instead?” Simple-- stay positive. It might seem easier said than done, but it's important. It'll be good for you, because it'll help keep you from staying bogged down in the bad feelings leftover from your split.

It's also good for helping you win back your ex, since happiness is contagious and people are naturally drawn to those that make them feel good. It will also make your ex wonder what's making you so happy, since it can't possibly be him. A combination of jealousy and curiosity will send him running back to you.

Staying positive doesn't have to mean faking your emotions, either. Do the kind of things that you enjoy, and hang around the kind of people you like associating with. This is where a strong network of good friends and a lot of interests come in handy.

If you don't have a lot of friends, consider joining an online group related to one of your hobbies or interests, taking an enrichment class, or attending a lecture. All of these things will help put you in touch with people and things that can help restore your positive outlook on life, and make it easier for you to answer “what can I do to get him back?”

“I want him back” doesn't have to last forever. By maintaining a happy, energetic aura and making sure that your interactions with your ex always end on a positive note, you'll make him want to kick himself for leaving you.

Best of all, you might even come out of your experiences with new friends and hobbies that will bring you long-term happiness, in and out of your relationship.