Few things in life are more painful than infidelity. Especially when you're saying "my husband cheated on me" and you have no idea how to deal with the negative emotions that are brewing.

Not only are you dealing with a broken trust, but you've also got the negative images swimming around in your mind of your husband and the other woman.

You're in pain, you're angry, and you can't possibly see a way to salvage the marriage and move on, even for the kids' sake.

But at the same time, you know divorce would be a huge nightmare, and you don't want to throw it all away because of one mistake he made.

Here's what you need to do to overcome the pain of your husband cheating and get your life back.

1. Allow the anger

You have a right to feel angry at your husband for what he did. It was a betrayal of trust, and getting angry is a natural human response.

It will be better in the long run for both you and your husband if you can take your anger out in a positive way instead of on him.

He made a mistake and probably feels really awful for it if he knows that you know. (If he doesn't, you need to get it out in the open - but let him know you're willing to accept what he did and forgive him.)

Take your anger out ina healthy way. Try exercise - boxing and aerobics are great, high-intensity workouts that let you channel your emotions into a positive outlet.

Journal about your feelings. Just write down EVERYTHING you're feeling, if it's a bunch of angry thoughts. Better to get it down on paper than to yell and shout - or take it out on the closest human being.

2. Give yourself time

Allow yourself some time to work through and process what's happened. You need to decide if you really can forgive your husband and work through it - if that's what you want.

Forgiving someone for infidelity can be a tough thing to do. But in the long run, if you really want to make it work with your husband, and you feel you've truly got a loving bond that will save your marriage, then you can work through this.

Just be patient, and don't expect the anger and pain to go away overnight. Focus on feeding yourself healthfully, getting plenty of exercise, and making sure all of YOUR needs are met.

3. Develop a plan

When you've dealt with the pain of your husband cheating, it's time to come up with a plan of action. Do you need to counseling with your husband? Or do you want to try "dating" him again?

If you choose to date your husband to rekindle the spark in your marriage, choose "feel good" spots that will make you both laugh, not places where you're inclined to get into a lot of talking (that could lead to fighting).

A comedy bar or going to see a funny movie are good date ideas for when you're trying to reconnect and make your marriage solid and whole after infidelity.

Just focus on keeping the encounter light and easy, and avoiding the topic of the affair as much as possible.