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Are you in a situation where you're practically OCD from worrying about the breakup with your ex? No contact is actually the only way to get out of this vicious cycle. Rather than staring at the phone for hours and obsessively waiting for your ex to call - or worse, calling her - you need to keep yourself healthy and focus on your own life, needs, and wants.
You can go out with friends. Doing a little partying and/or drinking is okay as long as you do it in moderation and don't let yourself drown your sorrows (and make that desperate drunken 2 am call). Don't do anything stalkerish like parking near your ex's house or apartment. Rather you need to just get away from this person as much as you can. I know it is really hard, but it's necessary if you want to get them back later on, or have any chance of doing so whatsoever.
One thing you might try doing is focusing hard on your career or your classes if you are in college. Go and get fit at the gym or even just by walking or running around your local campus. At some point you will probably feel angry at your ex - this is actually normal and healthy. Keep working through the anger and the negative emotions by exercising. These help to remind you that things may not have been as rosy with your ex as you thought.
What will start to happen is that you will regain your self respect. It will be tough to do, but no contact is ultimately the only way you can regain sanity in your life. What may happen is that your ex will contact YOU again and at that point you have to figure out if you still want them back. And if you do you will be in a much better frame of mind to figure that out.
If nothing else remember this: time heals all wounds. Even if it is really really hard right now not to think about your ex, it's up to you to get through this problem. You'll only make it worse on yourself if you obsess over them, and over the breakup, so spare yourself that pain by going no contact.
What can you do in the meantime? Workout, get hobbies, focus on yourself and your own personal goals. The point of the no contact rule is to get your life back, and that's what will happen. It takes TIME above all else so you must remember this, and allow your impatience to pass. Don't let it make you do something stupid that you'll regret later. Exercise will help a lot. So will making new friends and getting new hobbies or reconnecting with old ones. Basically, now is your chance to live your life again without being enslaved to someone else.
If your ex does want you back again later, great - they will contact you. For now you need to enforce the no contact rule so that you can regain your sanity after a breakup.
ooh i needed this article 3-months ago. I really screwed up and now he thinks i am a stalker because i continued to text him once every week or every other week. and he is really pissed off about it. I think the no-contact rule is great, i allows you to clear your head completely before you say something you will regret that will completely piss them off.
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