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Understanding The Breakup - Why She Left And How You Can Get Her Back
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Understanding the breakup that occurred with you and your girlfriend can be a difficult challenge.  Here are some reasons she might have left, and what you can do to get her back.

The reasons your girlfriend left may be multiple.  It could be:

1. She has a lack of passion for you, because you have a lack of passion in your life.

2. She's not interested in a relationship, and felt you were putting too much pressure on her for one.

3. She senses your own self-esteem issues, and the gaps in your life that aren't being fulfilled.

Do you feel you have a lack of passion in your life?  It's wise to assess your life after a breakup.  Consider the exact place in your life - where you are now, and where you want to be, in terms of your career and your personal life.

If you're really serious about meeting a girl and settling down to raise a family, you need someone willing to do that.  But if your goal is simply to have a good time and enjoy life with an attractive girl, you need to change your behavior.

Stop putting pressure on the girl for a relationship.  You simply need to focus on YOU - your life, your passions, your hobbies.  Few men realize how attractive this makes them to women.  Women want an independent man who goes after what he wants.

It's the thrill of the chase factor.  If the girl sees that you're going after the things you want out of life, she will automatically follow you.  You won't have to work so hard to keep her attention, because you'll become subconsciously attractive.

Now, if you also have self-esteem issues that make you feel somehow less worthy than your ex-girlfriend, or like you have to beg for her attention, it's a good idea to address these as well.  You need to change your thinking so that you're no longer the one chasing her; she should be chasing you.

Understanding the breakup is a necessity we all have after being dumped.  In reality, though, trying to understand what happened will only drive you crazy.

Instead, work on fixing what you CAN fix.  This includes the things in your life that you feel aren't happening, like at work, or with your own personal life goals. 

Assess your career.  Make a list of what you can improve about your work, and what you'd like to change.  If you're unhappy at your job, start finding ways to go after the job you really do want. 

If you're unhappy about yourself, make a list of the things you'd like to see in yourself.  This might be a better body, more money, less anxiety when hanging out with people if you struggle socially, etc.  Basically, now is your time to change all the things that you don't like about yourself.

You don't need to think of the breakup as a failure; instead, seize it as an opportunity.  Now is your chance to change your own behaviors to make yourself more attractive to your ex girlfriend.  When you've taken the time to do that, you can ultimately go about getting her back.  

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