There is one secret weapon to getting someone back after a breakup: the no contact rule.  Here's how it works and why it's so effective.

1. No contact gets you away from the source of your pain and emotional insanity.

While the last thing you want after a breakup is to get away from your ex, it's actually the most important thing you CAN do when you're trying to win him back.  This is because no contact gets you away from the source of emotional turmoil (your ex).

And that source of emotional turmoil is what makes you do crazy things.  Have you ever suffered a breakup and constantly texted that person repeatedly trying to figure out what you did wrong?  This behavior unfortunately drives your ex away. 

So with no contact, you avoid that problem completely, which increases your chances later on of getting him back.

2. No contact lets you feel sane again.

After a few weeks of no contact, you'll still get "pangs" for your ex, but your emotional state will at least be much less crazy.  It's that initial breakup time that makes us feel insane.  With no contact, you can at least start to regain some sense of normalcy to your life.

But the key with no contact is not to sit around being depressed; you need to actively take steps to get yourself out of depression, and get your mind off your ex.

Going out with friends is a great way to do it.  Calling your friends and hanging out with them can really help.  Or if you're not the social type, simply doing something that gets you out of teh house (where you're more likely to brood) is a good idea. 

3. No contact gives you both time to heal.

You probably said things to your ex that you regret, and he probably feels that way too.  No contact lets you both get some space from each other, which can often be exactly what you need to get your relationship back on track.

By implementing the no contact rule, you will be doing both of you a huge favor.  It will help a lot later on when you re-establish contact, because the raw emotional wounds won't be so fresh.

Ultimately, the no contact rule works by getting you away from the source of your pain, allowing you to regain sanity in your life, and giving both of you a chance to heal.  Used correctly, it is one of the most powerful tools for getting your ex back after a breakup.  How long it takes to use no contact effectively depends on each situation, but 30 days is a good point to shoot for.