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How To Get Out Of The Friend Zone
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How to Get Out Of the Friend Zone

She wants a guy just like you, but she can't date you because you are too close - you're in the friend zone...

You're a nice guy, but she doesn't want to make things weird by taking it to the next level - you're in the friend zone...

She asks you for advice about her other love interests - you're in the friend zone...

The friend zone is a horrible place - us men dread it. Constantly landing in the friend zone can cause major frustration to your dating life. It hurts us when a women we are very interested in is only interested in a friendship. Being put into the friend zone is like being rejected. Once you're in the friend zone with a girl you want, it messes with your ego - it hurts your pride.

Not only does being trapped in the friend zone bring frustration, but you never reap the benefits of getting out of the friend zone. Getting out of the friend zone just once can can boost your confidence and significantly improve your dating life. Relationships with former friends are often times the most durable, and even those that don't work out feel better than the constant frustration of being trapped in the friend zone.

Sadly, a number of men who find themselves in the friend zone do so repeatedly and never truly figure out how to get out. However, there is a way out. So whether you're someone who's been constantly placed in the friend zone by women or someone just trying to turn a particular friend into a lover, this article is for you.

Now is not the time to spill your guts

You haven't made a move the whole 2 years that you've known her, but now you've mustard up the courage to spill your guts? A courageous move, but not a SMART move.

Guys who are desperate to get out of the friend zone often think that the best method for getting out of the friend zone is by professing your feelings to her. When men do this, it often comes out of frustrations. You've been in the friend zone so long, or you've landed in the friend zone so many times that you simply just want something - anything - different to happen.

Resist this urge! This is going to get you a quick rejection 90% of the time. Romantic relationships must be based on some form of attraction. In other words, she must have romantic feelings for you. Although spilling your guts takes a lot of courage, it doesn't stir her emotions and feelings for you.

Instead you must have patience when approaching the situation. You're going to have to build attraction between the two of you. She currently sees you as just a friend, and you must change that so she sees you as something more than a friend. Remember, it took time to get in the friend zone, so now it's going to take time to get out of the friend zone.

Distance yourself

Sounds counterproductive doesn't it? Why would you want to distance yourself from the girl you're trying to get? I'm sure you've heard the phrase "distance makes the heart grow fonder". Well you're going to use this to your benefit and I'll tell you how and why.

First things first, you must come to terms with the fact that your approach hasn't been working. By giving yourself some distance from her, you essentially step back and take a different approach to the situation. You're doing yourself a service by giving yourself room to room to think and try a new angle instead of diving deeper into the friend zone.

Secondly, creating distance can help you build some attraction. By making yourself less available to her, she can no longer take you for granted. This will cause her to start valuing the time you have together - especially if you hang out a lot. It also boosts your value by letting her know that you have other ways to spend your time than being with her 24/7.

Play the field

This goes hand in hand with distancing yourself. You not only want to spend less time with the girl you're interested in, but you want to spend more time with other women.

When trying to get out of the friend zone, many men make the mistake of trying so hard that they become desperate for that one girl. They become too needy and emotionally invested. Girls are not attracted to this! They are attracted to guys with abundance in their life - guys with options. They are not attracted to guys who are desperate for their attention. By having other potential romantic interests you stop yourself from becoming needy.

Secondly, playing the field sparks a little jealousy. Jealousy can be a trump card when trying to attract a particular women. In fact, if jealousy could be put in a bottle and sold as cologne, i would just tell you to buy it and it would end all of your dating problems! Since that's not the case though, you'll have to trigger it naturally.

When the girl you're interested in sees you with other women, it'll spark a little jealousy and will cause her to want you more. You can up the ante a little bit by talking about these other girls to her. However, you don't want make it seem as if you are trying to make her jealous. If she's ever talked about one of her love interests then you know how this can work - now it's time to use it in your favor!

Get flirty

This is where you start doing the stuff that you should have been doing in the first place! To reiterate what was stated early, you're in the friend zone because you lacked sexual intent. You came off as simply a friend, so she wasn't interested in more. Now is time to correct that.

You’re going to be seeing her a lot less now (remember, distance yourself) so you need to spend the time you do see her building attraction. Start with playful flirting then build it up.

Physical contact is a huge key to flirting so the more contact the better. Get comfortable with touching her - make her more and more accustomed to your touch. Escalate and push the boundaries of your relationship through flirty touching.

I know that this step will be nerve-racking. If it wasn't you would have done this from the outset and avoided the friend zone altogether. However, you must not be hesitant in you attempts to push the boundaries of the relationships. Every time you are flirtatious with her, you must show confidence.

Push it over the edge

By now the interactions between you and the your love interactions should have changed. There should be a flirtatious vibe among you and should be comfortable with each other's touch. Now its time to push your friendly relationship into a romantic one. You're now looking for the one key moment to turn it into such.

Your first option is to go for the kiss. This option takes the most courage but it is most effective. Nothing changes the dynamics of a relationship more than a nice, long lip lock!

Kissing her should be a culmination of all of the physical contact and flirting that you have done to this point. Going from physical contact to a kiss should be a natural progression at this point. Do it when it "feels right" - but don't use this as an excuse to procrastinate the kiss. Rather, when the physical contact and attraction has build up to a certain point - go for it.

You're other option is to let her know that you're interested. Once again, you're not spilling your guts here - so don't tell her that she's your dream girl, that you've loved her for 2 years, or anything to that nature. The trick is to keep it casual. It should feel like a natural progression. Let her know that you're into her and see where it goes from there.

So there you have it fellas - your journey out of the friend zone starts now. Keep things in perspective and never get too emotionally attached to one girl. Share your thoughts in the comment section.

Street Talk

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