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Living A Lie: How Well Do You Really Know Your Partner?
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Living A Lie: How Well Do You Really Know Your Partner?

Let's face it, guys. We've all been there. You've met the most incredible woman, but she's completely out of your league. How do you win her over? What do you do to get her to see all of the good things in you, and none of the bad?

Perhaps it's a natural instinct to always want to put your best foot forward. You dress well, you always try to be polite, and you pop more breath mints than a junkie who's trying to get his fix. But what happens when your determination to impress goes a little too far? Are you willing to live a lie?

As with most things, it probably starts with the little things. You color the gray out of your hair. Maybe you're not exactly honest when you divulge your age. But where do you draw the line? Do you lie about your salary? Or maybe you say you're single when you've really been divorced. What about exaggerating your education, or maybe renting a really nice car, and pretending that it's your own?

I can't say that I've ever done any of these things, but something did happen to me several months ago. I woke up one morning, was taking a shower, and then all of a sudden, a lyric popped into my head. It was a nice short lyric with a cute little melody. It was about the secrets that we keep in order to make ourselves look good, or maybe just less ugly, to others. A short lyric led to an entire chorus. A chorus led to supporting verses, which then finally led to a song. To this day, I can't figure out what caused that little lyric to pop into my head that morning, but I can say that I've been thinking about the concept of social deception ever since. How far are we willing to go to impress someone? Would you live a lie?

I think we can all agree that lies in a relationship is at the very least, unhealthy, and at it's worst, down right dangerous. But where is that line? Some may agree that it's okay to pretend that you're interested in something that you're not, in order to gain her affection. And hardly anyone would agree that an affair is okay. But what about those less obvious situations that are in between the extremes?

If you try to research statistics on lies in a relationship, it turns out that most statistics are about affairs, or infidelity. Perhaps this fact alone suggests that most of society is okay with lies other than infidelity. To them, maybe it's okay to live a lie. But I have to believe there's a line somewhere between coloring your hair, and infidelity.

Now I've heard the common saying. I'm sure we all have. "Just be yourself". I'm sure this is easy advice when you already have everything going for you and you're Mr. Perfect. But what if you are stuck in the wrong category? What if you're the guy with the unforgivable flaws, or the make-her-head-for-the-door qualities? Being yourself can then seem unrealistic if you want the woman who has high standards. You could heighten your own standards for yourself, but is that really being yourself? Does a person in that situation just have to live a lie?

I won't pretend to be Dr. Phil. I have no real experience in this area. But most would agree that the topic is interesting. To many, it is certainly relatable.

Someone once told me that when two people are in a relationship, they grow closer and become more accepting of one another. I suppose this makes sense. However this doesn't say anything about how much deception is acceptable. It merely says that less deception is necessary as time goes on. So again, where's that line? How do you win her over in the beginning, during that time when she's unwilling to accept your flaws? I would give an answer, but it would only be a guess.

So what's the truth about deception in a relationship? Statistics show that only 31% of marriages survive an affair. With odds this low, I'm sure it's much safer to just stay loyal, and always be honest.

Listen to the song that inspired this article.


Street Talk

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