With enough patience and practice, you can learn the art of attracting a good man. After a bit of trial and error, you will begin to more easily recognize what is working and with this newfound experience, become an expert at it.
Connecting with people in general is truly an art. We have all met people in our lives that have the "gift of gab," and can easily meet and talk to just about anyone. It comes easily and naturally to them.
How can you develop your skills in this area, especially when it comes to attracting a good man?
The first thing you need to do is define what a good man means to you. Surely, it is not a man who is rude, selfish and/or treats you badly either verbally or physically. That should be obvious to everyone.
However, a good man means different things to different people. For one woman, an important trait may be neatness and that would mean a good man. But to other women, maybe tidiness is not that big of a deal, but spending time with the family is critical.
A good man for one woman might mean someone who is extremely romantic, buying flowers and candy to celebrate special occasions. Some women don't care for the flowers, and prefer to save the money as opposed to spending it on anything other than absolute necessities.
It is safe to say that there are some common things that qualify a good man to most everyone. A good man might be someone who you can know would do anything for you. He wants to take care of you, and goes out of his way to know that you are safe.
No matter how mad he gets at you, you know that once the dust settles, he wants nothing more than to kiss and make up. A good man is honest with you, and you can completely trust him no matter what is going on.
A good man will focus more on what you do and your good qualities rather than criticize, find fault with everything you do or nag you about anything and everything. A good man will do sweet and thoughtful things for you when you need it most. He will give you his shoulder to cry on, and sit down and work through problems with you. A good man is one you truly feel in a partnership with, and will often refer to you as his better half.
Some qualities in a good man might include dependability, honesty, integrity, a good sense of humor, patience, kindness and strength. Someone who naturally comes across as a good man without spending 20 minutes convincing you how great he is (yawn).
Exactly how can you hone your art and attract a good man?
For starters, less is always more. Specifically, talking less and listening more. By listening, you can pick up on things that really matter to him.
For example, when my husband and I were dating, he would be talking about a favorite thing he had as a child, why he liked it and why it meant so much to him. I would make note of the conversation, but I don't think he really thought I was listening very closely to his story. Months down the road, on our anniversary or his birthday, I would give him something that he was talking about in his story, like a book or artwork.
What an impact gifts like this had on him because he realized how much I cared to give him something that brought back good memories from his past. More importantly, he realized that I had really been listening to the story he was sharing from his heart, and remembered it.
So taking an approach of listening more than talking can give you many rewards. It will make him feel like the center of your universe, feel important by focusing all your attention on what he's saying and the bonus of getting great gift ideas or things to spoil him with in the future.
Even if he talks about how his mom would make the most fantastic banana pancakes when he was a little boy, and you make him banana pancakes that taste nothing like his mother made, he will still love you for the effort.
If your man is going through a tough time, maybe trying to find a job or being passed over for a promotion, take the opportunity to be his support system. The key here is to treat him like you would want to be treated.
Once you have an idea of the specific qualities you are looking for in a good man, then send out those vibes and expect to get what you are looking for. Think about your ideal man and what he might like to do. Where could you meet a man like that? Where would he hang out?
Create opportunities to meet your ideal man by imagining where he might be spending his time. It's important to get out there and actively participate in everything you can because you never know when you'll meet a good man.
Plus, it will give you more practice in perfecting your art. The art of attracting a good man.
You want to capture his attention with your conversation and make it a memorable one. You want to make him want to have more conversations with you in the future, and to want to get to know you better.
You do this by asking him interesting questions. Instead of a question like, “How long have you worked here?” you might ask something like what he would do with his time if money were no object. Find out what makes him tick. Find out what his passions are.
You might be inclined to ask if he lives in the area. A far more interesting question might be where he would live if he could pick anywhere in the world and why. He'll remember conversations like that. He'll remember you.
As a starting point, write down a list of all the traits you are looking for in a good man. Once you tweak and adjust your list, keep that image in mind and refuse to settle for anything less than you deserve.
From there, start actively looking for opportunities to master the art of attracting a good man.
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