If you have been through a tough break up and want to know how to get back with your ex, you are not alone. You may wonder what you can do to get your ex back. You may even wonder if you can get your ex back by changing yourself. The truth is, most break ups require a change in both of you in order for your relationship to work.

The changes I speak of do not always have to be drastic. If you know why you broke up in the first place, this is a great place to start. If you were fighting about something, money for example, and eventually broke up over it, then maybe creating a budget and sticking to it would be the answer. This is a change that both of you can make together to eliminate the fighting over that specific topic.

Maybe your break up was a bit more complex than that. If your ex is not willing to get together and talk to you about your relationship, then maybe examining areas where you could make positive changes will show him or her that you are committed to her or him and want to make things work. Don't do anything drastic; simply working out, working on your temper, looking at problem areas in your relationship and thinking out ways to improve them are all good changes that can be made.

The key is to show her that you are making positive changes and suggest changes that can be made together. If you can show her that you are willing to do whatever you can to make your relationship work, it is very likely that she will come back to you. There is no relationship advice better than working through your problems together. This can only make your relationship stronger and bring the two of you closer together.

NOW....

The issue at hand is HOW to show her that you are making positive changes?? If she doesn't really want to talk to you this can seem difficult. The best way to conquer your communication barrier is to write her a letter. Keep it simple and let her know that you are making some changes for her and that you would like a chance to work together on your relationship and you have a good chance to get back with your ex.

Keep you first letter pretty general, without a lot of detail. Then follow up with a letter or two explaining what your intentions are in more detail. If she responds to your letters, this is a great sign that she is open to the idea and you are well on your way to getting back with your ex.