I'm not an addiction counselor but I did go to school for education on using and acting out. I can tell you everything a person addicted to anything, think, feel, and want. This knowledge didn't come from reading online or from studying in some high-class college. I went to the school of hard knocks. Everything I share is from my experience.

Now don't expect me to tell you what I'm recovery from, because that's not why I'm writing this. I'm writing this to help save someone life because your loved ones is sick and the way you're responding to their illness could be killing them.

Addicts have a disease of the brain. It's not how they're acting that's the problem, it's the disease. Using drugs or using anything are all symptoms of this illness. This sickness cause addicts to go back over and over, unable to stop. That same illness are in many people but most aren't aware of it. It causes people to obsess over things like shopping, gambling, eating, sex, watching TV, or even reading a book. This illness is looking for a rush. The same rush drugs addicts look for when they're going to get high.

The best thing you can do is allow your loved ones to hit their bottom. Allow them to keep doing what they're doing until they get tired of themselves.The faster you stop trying to help them by enabling and control, the faster they'll get to their bottom and want some help. Addicts must want help for themselves. It's a choice they must make, not you. If you want to help them you have to accept this fact or the rest of my suggestions doesn't matter.

Stop trying to figure out what happened it's not your fault. So many parents or spouses blame themselves for their love ones problem. Let me make this perfectly clear. They use because they choose to use. You may not have been the best parent or spouse, but still you're not to blame for their choices, so give yourself a break.

Trust that God will help them. God is the one who's in control anyway. He watches over addicts like he watches over everyone else. Matter of fact, if you ask an ex-addict how he quit he would most likely say, "It was God it wasn't me." That's why it's so important to allow them to hit their bottom because that's usually where they find God. That's where I found him. Be mindful that every time you rescue them you're interrupting God's work.

Pray, pray and pray some more. Prayer always work. Prayer is that power the leads them to the 12 steps program. And I highly recommend one because it'll help them deal with the issues that lead them to their using or acting out. It could be AA, NA or Celebrate Recovery, a Christian 12 Steps program. And remember you're not the only one who's praying for them. At the end of each 12 Steps program meeting they are praying for your loved ones also.

Helping someone stop using or acting out is really all about letting go and letting God, and having faith that everything going to turn out right. Because in the end, only God can help them stop what they're doing, our job is to get out his way.