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Divorce is a traumatizing experience and while there are no couples who wish their marriage would end up in divorce, there are things that simply cannot be avoided. Issues in regards to divorce have existed since biblical times. The ways in dealing with divorce have evolved since, however, the reasons why marriages fall apart have not changed one bit.
In order to protect your marriage from divorce, it is imperative for you to fully comprehend the major reasons why couples end-up divorced.
Based on U.S. statistics, communication issues ranks first among the major reasons why bothâ¨men and women end-up being divorced. That cannot be argued because the most important aspect of any marriage that needs to be protected is communication. It is the very foundation, the core, the heart of a relationship. If communication becomes dysfunctional, everything else crumbles. And it leads to all the other problems that complete the list of the causes of divorce.
Another cause of divorce is violence. All married couples who are committed to their relationships are willing to go beyond any imaginable limits just to save the marriage. However, if you literally kill yourself in the process, it becomes an entirely different scenario. When one party becomes violent, the other would no longer feel that the relationship is worth saving and saving his or herself, becomes the priority.
Then there is money, money, money and money. It’s funny because I remember one song in the 90’s by Notorious B.I.G. that says “more money, more problems” and it works the other way as well. If you have no money still you have a lot of problems. It’s probably because money is not the problem. It’s about how you handle money or your finances, for that matter.
The truth is, when you and your partner end up broke, divorce will not make you have more money. You’d probably end-up having less. Having financial difficulties is a perfect opportunity for the two of you to build your relationship, to work together as a team. If it works out in the end, it is all going to feel way better than when somebody had just given you that same amount of money.
And then comes the third-party. Infidelity or even suspicions of infidelity can cause a great deal of stress to a relationship. Then again, a lot of marriages recover from this and on many occasions the party who cheated will be given a chance to cheat for a second, a third or who knows how many times again. And this is when issues about trust become so overpowering that it consumes the entire relationship. That is why if you are not ready to commit, please do not.
Marriage is not something from a department store that when you find out its broken, you return it. It is an all in one deal. If it’s broken, you fix it. Don’t go shopping for another one!
At the end of the day, the more pressing concerns when discussing issues about divorce is not just why people get divorced but how people recover from it or if they even recover. Effects of divorce encompass the emotional struggle of the husband, the wife and its most destructive effect could be on the children.
Initially, both partners will have a hard time recollecting their thoughts, emotions and some even sink into depression after the breakup. Their challenge becomes the ability to establish new relationships after going through a dysfunctional one. Amazingly, statistics show that among those who got divorced, 75% among women and 81% among men will remarry within the next 10 years.
Even when both parties seem down at the start, this somehow does not affect their ability to have relationships in the future. Both men and women clearly are able to have a positive recovery after a divorce. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said on its effects on children.
Children are the ones who are seriously affected. Their parents may be able to begin new relationships but children, who become severely traumatized by their parents’ breakup, may not be capable of building meaningful relationships.
A study mentioned that, Compared to children from homes disrupted by death, children from divorced homes have more psychological problems. The death of a parent is less devastating to a child than a divorce.
And what is more is that according to a recent study, those who were unhappy but remained married had a greater chance of being happy after five years than those who got divorced. So, if you think divorce will make you happier, Think again.
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