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You may be at the point where you think steps to save a marriage destined for divorce is not going to help your situation. May I politely ask you to stop thinking that way right now? Divorce is not inevitable as some may have you thinking. I hope you explore with me the possibilities you have to save your marriage from ending in divorce.
3 Key Steps To Save A Marriage
Step 1 – Take a step back and revise your plan to save your marriage
Marriage is often times a complicated relationship that requires insight and patience to understand what’s really going on. You see very often just when you think you have your spouse figured out you realize that you aren’t quite there yet. In some instances when you do have a handle on what’s going on in your marriage, your spouse throws you a curve ball and knocks you right off your feet.
Sometimes the person best suited to analyze and solve a problem is someone who isn’t right smack in the middle of the problem. You most likely have been hard at work looking for those key steps to save a marriage headed for a crash landing. However, the problem is that you are so busy trying to fix your marriage that you might have lost focus on what needs to be fixed in your marriage.
I would suggest that you spend some quality time taking a look at your marriage and documenting what you believe are the key issues tearing apart your marriage and make sure your energy and effort is being dedicated to fixing those problems. I think you should prioritize them and make sure that you are tackling the ones that are inching you closer and closer to divorce.
Step 2 – Become a great listener and reader
There are a few things that all couples need to do more of in their marriage but for whatever reason neglect doing. Have you noticed a change in your relationship as time has gone by? When you were dating you were constantly gazing into each other’s eyes or spending hours talking to each other about anything. Now fast forward to your current relationship. You probably spend only a couple of quality minutes each day talking and gazing into each other’s eyes is a distant memory.
What you and your spouse could probably benefit from is improving your verbal and non-verbal communication. Make sure that instead of letting what your spouse says go in one ear and out the other that you take a genuine interest in what is being said and what feelings are being expressed. Also, read between the lines and don’t miss the opportunity to resolve a minor major issue before it turns into a big one. For example, when your spouse says something like “I really don’t want to do this but if it makes you happy I will”, don’t settle for just you getting your way or being happy. Try to understand your spouse’s unhappiness and see if you can’t compromise so that you both are pleased.
Step 3 – Become a great marriage partner now
Have you made promises that you were going to change to make your marriage better but failed to do so? Perhaps you were thinking about being more romantic or caring or respectful or available to pitch in with raising of your children? Why not start today being the spouse you have been promising to be? It could be all that your spouse needs to regain hope that all is not lost in your marriage. Your marriage turnaround has to start somewhere so why wait to talk about it and make promises that your spouse will be skeptical of.
Remember the things you came up with in step 1 above that are your major stumbling blocks to having a great marriage? Well, why not start doing your part to tear down those walls that have been pushing you apart. Be considerate and put the interest of your spouse and marriage before your own and you will become a great marriage partner and transform your marriage.
I realize that marriage is not always easy and when things are going bad it’s hard to see how things can get better. If you follow the steps to save a marriage as outlined above I think you will be on your way to turning around your marriage. If you would like more tips and advice regarding building a better marriage, please visit my blog; Help In Marriage.
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