This Article is About
seniors
elderly parents
occasional trip
daunting task
good health
blood pressure
feelings
Home Care For Seniors
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Home Care for Seniors

I am writing this article because it is something I have experience with and care about. Those of you who have elderly parents know what a daunting task it can be to see to their needs. The amount of in home care needed for Seniors is only going to increase.

There are a lot of reasons to keep Seniors at home as long as possible. It could be financial due to the huge cost of nursing homes. It could be that even though they are elderly they are in reasonably good health and have a sharp mind or it could be that you hate to take that final step and put them in a nursing home.

In my case it was a promise made. That promise was to keep my mother out of a nursing home as long as possible. She will be 93 this month. Her body is falling apart but her mind is sharp. I have been her caretaker for nearly eight years and it has been a struggle at times. I doubt that I am the only one who struggles with my feelings about the daily care it requires to make sure she is safe and well.

Sometimes I just don’t want to do it. To a lot of people that probably sounds awful and selfish so let me tell you my schedule. I check on her daily. (she still lives alone). After work during the week and randomly over the weekend. While there I check her blood pressure, make sure all the little tasks are taken care of and share some time with her. Sometimes we even share a Budweiser together.

That doesn’t sound so bad but try it day in and day out for a few years. There are other time commitments. Taking care of her finances, taking her to doctors appointments and the occasional trip to the emergency room. Making arrangements for her care when we go on vacation. Wondering if your vacation will be cut short because she falls or has one of her many episodes that even the doctors can’t figure out.

The readers are probably saying “what a whiner” All I can say is don’t judge if you haven’t experienced it. I love my Mom and 99% of the time I don’t have a problem with taking care of her. The other 1% can be hard. Lucky for me, I have a wife who helps and understands and children who do their best to help out.

I know there are other caretakers out there who share my feelings. It’s a pretty awful feeling to know there are times you just don’t want that responsibility. You wonder. What the hell is wrong with me but you get over it and life goes on. The scary part is that my generation is next in line to need in home care.


Street Talk

Amy4  

John, I've been a nurse and senior caregiver the past 18 years (I'm 40). I love seniors, from the most lucid, intelligent fun loving to the most confused, fiesty grouches you can encounter. Keep writing about your experiences. I have touched on mine in an article about being a caregiver. It is an overwhelming task, but one you have done with love, and done WELL. KUDOS TO YOU. I can't tell you the many who lie in the nursing homes with no family there when they pass on. You are the exception, and a great one at that.

Reply
  about 7 years ago

Thanks Amy I appreciate your comment

Reply
  about 7 years ago

John, maybe many of us are echos of each other. My Dad is 90 and my husband's Mother, 86, and they each live on their own just 3 miles from us in opposite directions. We cook meals and deliver them, take them to doctors appointments, try to spend friendship time. We both work. Every call that comes in at odd times is jarring. We are lucky they are both in relatively good health and are loving people. And yes, we often feel very whiney in among feelings of gratitude that we still have them.

Reply
  about 7 years ago

Thanks for sharing Sherry

Reply
  about 7 years ago

My heart goes out to you John and I feel for everything you pointed out. I took care of my mother for 6 years, and I can tell you that I will be the last person to think you are whining. Writing is a great release for getting things off your mind, and this article just helped you release some of the things you needed to put into words.Good job!

Reply
  about 7 years ago

Thanks Shawn

Reply
  about 7 years ago

To Cynthia and Rebecca. Thanks for the kind words. I came very close to pulling the article out of self doubt but decided to let it get published in spite of my misgivings.

Reply
  about 7 years ago

Hi John, I'm glad you didn't pull it, I know someone in a similar position and know that it can be incredibly stressful being the main carer for someone you love.

Reply
  about 7 years ago

My parents aren't there yet, but did ask me to promise the same as your mom did. I hope I am as blessed with patience as you are.

Reply
  about 7 years ago

John, I for one am proud of you! That is a *HUGE* commitment. You've been successful day in and day out. Week after week. Year after year. Being there for her daily. Making other arrangements on vacations. Bravo! Great article. blessings, Cynthi

Reply
  about 7 years ago
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