This Article is About
coffee shop
cup of coffee
hundred times
flip side
good mood
bad day
emotions
boss
Our Responses Dictate Our Outcomes
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We have the power to control our emotions. Because of this we are solely responsible for the way we feel. Whether you have a good or bad day is your decision. There will be events throughout the day to test us but ultimately our responses to the events determine the outcome of any situation.

Have you ever had one of those days that you just wanted to go back to sleep, wake up and start over? At every turn someone or something was getting under your skin. Your children upset you, the lady at the coffee shop pissed you off and your boss was being intolerable. The copy machine wouldn’t work no matter how hard you hit it and your computer was moving at the speed of snail. Does any of this sound familiar?

On the flip-side, have you ever had a day that everything went perfectly? Your children got out of bed without asking them a hundred times, you got your usual cup of coffee at the corner store, the boss was in a good mood and every computer and machine at the office worked to perfection.

Is it possible that the two days were actually the exact same? The only difference is how you perceived the two? I say it is not only possible, but highly likely. Look at the events, they are the same. You dealt with your children, stopped for coffee, went to work and did the usual routine of working with various machines and computers. Looks exactly the same doesn’t it? How could two days be so different? Your reactions to the events caused the different outcomes.

Of course this is a fictitious story so I do not know what the exact reactions were but I can make a few guesses. You may not have slept very well the morning your children did not want to get out of bed. Perhaps you only asked them twice but because you were in a foul mood it seemed like a hundred. You are now upset as you drive to get your coffee. The lady at the counter takes, what seems to you, an eternity to take your money and give back your change. You travel to work upset at your children and at the stupid girl at the coffee shop. You walk into work and your boss asks you for a report that you were supposed to turn in. How dare that intolerable man ask you for something without wishing you a “good morning” first! You head down to the copy room to make copies of your report. You are so frustrated and upset that your hands are shaking and you can’t quite get the paper aligned correctly in the copier. “Stupid machine”, you shout as you kick and beat on it because “it” will not “accept” the paper.

The very next day, you wake up from a good night’s rest. You go wake up the children and ask them to get out of bed. After the fourth time you jokingly pull the covers off and start singing loudly. The kids laugh and get out of bed. You kiss your children goodbye and head to the coffee shop. The lady at the counter is taking longer than usual, but you notice she has gotten a haircut. As she is working on counting your change you complement her new look, she says “thank you” gives you your change and you drive to work. You arrive at the office with your boss waiting on you to ask for the report. You tell him “no problem, I think you are going to like what I have put together”. He tells you he can’t wait to read it and says “oh yeah, by the way, good morning”! You go to the copy room, easily make a copy of your report and turn it in.

Two exact same days, but two completely different results. The only difference in either day was how you responded to the events that were laid out in front of you. Other people cannot upset us. They can say or do something and we must decide whether or not to get upset and bent out of shape from it. If you learn to control your responses you will learn to master your emotions. Practice trying to respond in a positive way to the events in your life today. I promise you will be happy with the results!


Street Talk

Sherry B.  

Great article! Very true too. I've realized that these kind of days are just the way we perceive them and respond to things. It does actually work to use a positive outlook even if we do wake up a bit crabby, it's best to get over it and at least act positive. Things usually start getting better and before you know it, you're not feeling tired and crabby anymore either. It's always good to laugh or make someone else laugh too. Makes the whole day so much better.

Reply
  about 9 years ago

Wow, that was a great article I just read. Today was my bad day! It was my computer. I am working on my bootcamp lessons. I was typing my Getting Started into Word Press.I got about 1/4 of the way and my computer (it's a lap top) went bang and deleted everything I had typed. I was devastated. I started again and dang, it did it again when I was 1/2 way completed. Lost everything. Finally I typed a few paragraphs, copied it. Typed more paragraphs and copied it util I was finished. Went to Namecheap. Completed everything and as I was finishing the payment detail, it happened again! It is now 8 p.m. I have been on this computer almost all day. I will have to go back on Namecheap and redo it tomorrow. I hope my computer gets a good night sleep and behaves tomorrow.

Reply
  about 9 years ago
  

I am glad my article could help!

Reply
  about 9 years ago

Boy, your opening paragraph could not ring true more. I live my life by this motto. Good article Aaron!

Reply
  about 9 years ago
Cena  

You make it sound so simple. Thank you. I have to control my emotion and learn to relax myself.

Reply
  about 9 years ago

Perfectly beautiful and accurate as can be.

Reply
  about 9 years ago
Ivy Glenn  

You are soooo right on with this. However, I think attitude is what we control, not really the emotions. The emotions follow our attitude. It comes down to creating our self-talk (you know, the stuff we say to ourselves in our head.. that nobody else can hear) that can change our thinking. For instance, when somebody cuts you off on the freeway, most people get frustrated, and many get angry. This is NORMAL to feel like that, and it is a raw emotion. It is what we do with it that makes the difference. We can (in our heads) say "what a jerk" etc and follow that with a diatribe of all this is wrong with others on the road, OR we can say something like, "oh, I have done that", and move on. Self talk can be our best friend or our worst enemy. Becoming aware of it is the first key step. Once we actually become aware, we can actually start to control it. Our emotions follow.

Reply
  about 9 years ago
  

Thank you for the feedback. I think our emotions control our attitudes. I agree getting angry when you get cut off is a normal response, Couldn't we train ourselves to not get angry when this happens and that become our new "normal" response? I believe if we learn to respond positively to any event in our life(good or bad) our initial response or emotion will mirror our response. That is what I was trying to convey by saying learning to control your responses will help you master your emotions. It is however quite possible we are saying the exact same things and are just defining the words emotion, responses and attitudes a little differently. Again, thank you for the feedback, it made me question my words and thoughts. Great job!

Reply
  about 9 years ago

Very true. Sometimes you just have to drop the negativity and start fresh.

Reply
  about 9 years ago
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