TOXIC PEOPLE HOW TO IDENTIFY

Family, friends, and co-workers, like it or not, we have to deal with these folks; spend time with them and try to get along. Sometimes friends out grow each other, they have completely different life styles and interests. We may find that some friends may change into a person, we do not get along with anymore and seeing each other is draining.

Family, (got to love em,) in my experience we love them as they are part of our heritage. This doesn't sound all warm and fuzzy I know however, let's be real. There is a difference between those whose quirks drive you nuts and those who do not possess the social graces you wished they had. We should and many of us do, often times, forgive a family member who has talked about your children, borrowed something and never gave it back. Let's see here, embarrassed you in a restaurant, with politically incorrect jokes or statements (loudly) in public. "Let's have a nice family dinner all together at our favorite dining spot," who said that? Off with their heads!

Life is very short and I am sure you, like myself, would like to have a large considerate family who are there to support and care for each other.

We often have member's in our families, who are just: bad to the bone. They relish in starting trouble and chaos within the family, do some heartless things most of us would never do to a stranger never mind a cousin, aunt or sister. The statements and/or untrue gossip is not just irritating; it's extremely hurtful and it happens a lot. When ever everyone is doing well and things are pretty calm, they will make sure to cause some family drama and pit one member against the other. Then they sit back acting the innocent and thoroughly enjoy watching the pain they have caused. Holidays ruined, feelings hurt that sink deep into our psyches for years and years. This a (toxic) person.

We all have friends that we enjoy and share funny and sad times with. If things get too uncomfortable or hurtful we can decide to stop seeing this person or persons and slowly fade away (hopefully). With family it is of cause very hard to do. Avoiding them at family holidays or making excuses why you don't want to go to a family outing. Not easy or fun. It is your choice, to decide if you want to be around this person or not, is it healthy for your children? Do you have to allow this person to throw another load of hurt on you?

I, myself, let's say "disengaged" from a person or two who likes to leave pain and trouble in their wake consistently. I will simply not allow it. I care about my well being both mentally and physically. I will give anyone a chance, but if you look at this person for years and see that this type of behavior seems attached to them, you should make a decision if whether being around this person is healthy for you. Do not try to drag others into it, let it be your choice alone.