It was love at first sight. I didn't know what to say at first, but finally the words came to me, so I turned to a female salesperson and asked "Can I try those white Avia's on?" I had not ever seen this brand of shoe before, but it didn't matter. It fit my criteria. It was an all purpose, walking, running, jumping, basketball, and eventually yard working shoe. If it were a horse, it would be a quarter horse and not a stallion, and it would enter the beginning of my shoe life cycle.

The first phase of the cycle

I will never, ever, ever wear these shoes in the grass, where they might get grass stains. I will wipe them down everyday with bleach to keep them white. I will only run in them on athletic surfaces or sidewalks, but never on tar surfaced pavements or old streets where they might get stained or roughed up. No, sir. I'm taking care of these puppies.

This phase lasts a few months after purchase. There will be some event where I don't think about it and all of a sudden I am planting a tree with a shovel using my new sneakers. A certain sadness comes over me at this point as I realize I have let my shoes down. I am forced to move to phase 2.

The second phase of the cycle

I will still run in my shoes as designed and sometimes I will wear them in the yard, but only a few times and only if I don't have time to go inside and get my current yard shoes. These are shoes I bought years ago, with grass stains and the logo worn and holes in the side. The underside of the shoe looks almost slick, sometimes causing me to slide on the grass. No basketball playing with those shoes because excess sliding will prevent me from dunking, which I have never been able to do up to this point. But with the new sneakers, there is always hope. This phase lasts a few months to several years.

Gradually, I walk on tar surfaced pavements, through wet grass, on glass, through potholes, kick footballs, but never....ever...do I mow the grass and weedeat in these shoes. That is what the old, yard shoes are for, not these brand new, old sneakers.

The third phase of the cycle

As busy family men often do, I mowed the yard one night. Young folks, listen to me and never get old. When you are so busy that you have to mow the grass at night, you are too busy. I didn't think and because it was dark, I couldnt even really see, but I accidentally mowed the grass with my brand new, old sneakers. After seeing what I did the next morning, it became inevitable for them to enter the third phase. I had to retire the old yard sneakers and replace them with my brand new, old sneakers I originally bought for walking, running, jumping....oh, well you get it.

As a part of the third phase, the shoe must be worn with no socks whatsoever. They must have the smell of my sweat soaked feet and my moisture wicking socks (wool) must never touch them again. A stringent rule that I have never broken. Apparently, the only stringent rule I have never broken.

I throw the old shoes away, use the brand new, old shoes for yard work and drive to the nearest shoe store, ready to fall in love again. I hope they still make Avias.