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Friends With Ex - The Advantages And Disadvantages
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Friends With Ex  -  The Advantages And Disadvantages

A big part of losing a relationship is losing the friendship that went along with it. Every couple bonds and forms a friendship, without friendship in the equation there can be no romance. If you and your ex had a deep friendship during the relationship you may be thinking that there is no reason why it shouldn't continue. It is not as simple as that however. When a couple breaks up the friendship that was a constituent part of the relationship won't be the same. If you were the one that was dumped then maintaining a friendship with your ex will inevitably lead to more intense heartache.You really have to seriously ask yourself if remaining friends with your ex will be worth it in the long run.

Is It Really A Bad Idea To Stay Friends With Your Ex?

You don't want to lose the person that you love entirely so you think that staying friends will prevent that. In an ideal situation there would be some advantages to staying friends with your ex. You could hang out together. You could still stay in touch with each other. You could support each other through the difficult times. Unfortunately we do not live in a perfect world and more often than not it doesn't work out like that.

The simple fact of the matter is that if you are still in love then staying friends with your ex will only intensify the pain of the breakup. Having someone so close, yet so far away, is torture, sheer torture. Every time you meet your ex or talk to them on the phone you will have to pretend that everything is ok and you are fine with the breakup. Everything is not ok! Keeping up an act so that you can keep your ex in your life in some form is not going to do either of you any good in the long term. Eventually the cracks will appear and it will be too late to put the situation right.

Remaining Friends Will Destroy Any Future Prospect Of Getting Back Together

The most likely result of remaining friends with your ex is that the breakup will remain permanent. This is not what you want. In all breakup scenarios there is the dumped and the dumper, if your ex thinks that you (the dumped) are cool with the breakup then they will see that as a green light to move on to another relationship. When that happens your ex will expect you to be ok with it. If you pretend that it is fine then it will tear you apart inside. If you make it obvious that you are not happy about it then that will cause strife. Either way, you will suffer a great deal.

What Is The Best Course Of Action

Well, it is simple if you want to get back together with your ex then you will have to rule friendship out. That might sound like a rash thing to do but it is the only way that you can give yourself some head space and clear the path back to the relationship. When you fall into the friendship trap it can be very hard to get back out again. In order to get the relationship you will have to put some space between you and your ex. You will have to create a void in your ex's life to make them want you back.

Making your ex miss you is the best way to get your relationship back. Your ex can't miss you if you are still around pretending that you are ok with just being friends. You need to let your ex know that you still love them and then say that you can't continue being friends because it is just too painful for you. After that you need to cut all contact with your ex, no phone calls, no texts, no e-mails, no nothing. People generally don't know what they have lost until it is gone. You need to remove yourself from your ex's life in order for them to notice what they have lost.

What Do I Do Now?

Being dumped is a terrible experience that can leave deep wounds. If you want your ex back then learning about the reasons why you were dumped will give you a new perspective on your situation.

Two other things that you will need to know about are - the no contact rule and breakup mistakes. Using the no contact rule to get back with an ex has a proven success rate, countless people have gotten back with an ex by using it. Learning how to avoid breakup mistakes is also crucial, you need to avoid the mistakes that most people make in the aftermath of a breakup. The more mistakes that you make the slimmer the chances of getting back with your ex will be.


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