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chief cook and bottle washer
ace bandage
responsible adult
can opener
life doesn
Left-handed Kitchen Adventures
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As mentioned in my previous articles, my interest in life as a “lefty” in a right-handed world started when I sprained my right wrist. I was ace-bandaged and still had limited use of my right hand but through my own clumsiness had to depend on my left hand as dominant for some time. Oh, the stories I could tell you about how clumsy I am! But I'll leave that for another day.

I got lots of sympathy and TLC on day one, but by day two I learned that for Mom life doesn't stop when you're bandaged. It doesn't even slow down much for that matter. The natives were getting restless and hungry and bored with spoiling me.

In fear of losing my standing as chief-cook and bottle-washer (if only), I determined that a little sprain wasn't going to keep me out of my own kitchen.

If I felt clumsy before, this experience made me feel like I not only wearing an ace-bandage but that I needed to be placed in a protective bubble. Every time I turned to my left to do anything, something or someone was in my way. It seems we had always naturally stayed out of each other's way on their right side.

A can of tuna might look pretty harmless sitting on a pantry shelf with Charlie smiling out at you but just try using a right-handed can opener with your left-hand. That friendly fish smile is there only to lure you into doing battle with Charlie's evil twin Chuck who actually lives in the can and doesn't particularly want to be your lunch.

In my carefree right-handed days I had heard of left-handed scissors but never given them much thought. During my bandage days I found myself in mortal danger of my own pair of kitchen scissors and staring at them incomprehensibly in a way that I image early cavemen must have first stared at the wheel.

All this led to some depressed moments when I realized that here I was, an otherwise capable, responsible adult wrestling with a can-opener (the can won) and spending a pitiful amount of time actually contemplating scissors.

I finally accepted defeat and wrote a clumsy (there's that word again) note to all concerned that the kitchen was closed due to insurmountable obstacles, tuna attack, and prehistoric utensils. I placed all the take-out menus we had in one neat pile near the phone and made a mental note (much more legible than the written one) to do some serious web research into left-handed kitchen tools.

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