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Ever Been Had? Not All That Glitters Is Gold
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Ever Been Had? Not All That Glitters is Gold

I took my dog, Lucy, out for her early morning walk this morning.

After the very wet weather we have had recently it was so nice to see the sun shining brightly in the clear blue sky. It was a great pick-me-up and I was feeling happy and optimistic. It's going to be a great day I thought to myself!

Lucy would probably appreciate not getting wet and cold as she had done the last few weeks, too.

There were a few puddles from yesterday's rain still on the ground, but they would probably soon disappear if it stayed sunny and dry for a few hours more.

We walked on, towards the muddy Common a short distance ahead.

Then I spotted what looked like a bundle of £5 notes, bound by an elastic band on the ground just ahead of me. My lucky day, I thought! I had been considering buying something and was having difficulties justifying the outlay to myself and my 'better half'. This could be the answer to my prayers, I thought!

The bundle of notes, which by this time appeared to be fifties, not fives, were laying in a puddle and were soaking wet. Not a problem, they will soon dry out, I thought.

On closer inspection I saw that they were £500 notes! An even luckier day!

I then started thinking that they might belong to a pensioner or someone even more needy than me! Guilt!

I put them in my pocket and walked on, wondering how I could return them to their rightful owner. Or should I just keep them and treat myself? More guilt! We walked on.

On reach the Common and away from the road, I stopped to examine my find. How many £500 notes were there. Is there such as thing as a £500 note anyway? I've never seen one, that's for sure!

I peeled one back. Drat! They weren't £500 notes after all, but €500 notes. Oh well, Euros are almost as good as pounds. The bank would probably exchange them.

I then noticed that they were dissolving! And, even more alarming, they were only printed on one side!

Fakes! Poor ones at that, too. I felt quite silly and disappointed!

Someone must have dropped them or thrown them away. Maybe they had tried to spend them. Not very likely, I thought, as Euros, although legal tender here, aren't that common in the UK and fake ones are certainly not something that could be easily passed off in a local shop! So why were they there, I wondered?

I then remembered that just around the corner from where I had found this very small fortune in scrap paper are some real coins - super-glued to the kerbstone. They have been there for a few years and I'm sure that they have given many hours of amusement, and maybe some hilarious Youtube footage, to the youngsters who live in the house nearby.

How many people have tried to pick up those coins and ended up with just broken fingernails? I have, I must confess!

I suspect that maybe the bundle of fake €500 notes might be their latest stunt and that someone other than me had already picked them up from the pavement just outside the perpetrator's bedroom window. No doubt providing great amusement and then thrown them away when they had realised they were fakes and that they had been had, only for me to find them again and pick them up. Hopefully out of eye and camera-sight this time!

But if not, look out for me and a brindle coloured Lurcher on YouTube, walking along and me stooping down to pick up a small item, guiltily putting it in my pocket and jumping for joy!

Well, grinning broadly, anyway.

I'm off to search YouTube now - just in case!

Street Talk

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