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I had my fairshare of relationships. I know what happiness, what sadness is. I had my devastating heartbreak that seriously tested me. I know what it feels like to lie in bed in the morning and feeling that if I closed my eyes, I would just die and never wake up again. However, I chose to get up. This experience drove me 15,500km away from that place and start a new life. Not really, but contributed subconsciously, I am sure...My heart felt empty and cold for many-many years after that. Still feels...

I found myself in a strange situation a few months ago. An old friend, an ex-colleague of mine resurfaced in my life. It is lovely to re-connect with old friends, especially, when one lives 15,000km away from family and friends. Every old friend is a diamond. They know who you are, who you were, no need to prove anything to them and you almost pick up the conversation where you left it off. Easy. Uncomplicated. They are part of your genetic make up.

The music world is small and this friend of mine is also a musician so we have a lot in common. On one of the Facebook pages that I started a person joined, whose surname was the same as my friend's. This was back in March.

I welcomed every new fan on that page with a personalized message through my cutting-edge online communication system. He wrote back in my mother tongue in the nicest, kindest style. We had a few funny emails in which I wrote to him instead of another person. This just made the start quite amusing between us.

Soon it came to light that he was the brother of my ex-colleague I was talking about so he heard about me a lot. We hit it off right away and an intensive communication started between us writing about everything that we could think of. We were emailing on Facebook night and day, stealing away hours from sleeping and leisure time. We hardly could wait to write and to read the reply. We desperately waited for that little green light to come on and see what the other posted that day.

One evening a beautiful love song was posted and that has changed everything. Being a musician, music was my language. He had a great musical taste and with incredible delicacy he chose the songs. What is rather incredible that the songs were all in English and he admittedly did not speak English which is nowadays not a big issue when it comes to songs. The music and the words went straight into my heart. I was shot by Cupid's arrow. My heart started to come alive and felt warmth again.

We spent 4-8 hours writing, exchanging emails, talking about everything and nothing. There was such intensity, emotion and energy between us despite 15,500 km-s that we both really wondered how this was all possible.

Two weeks after our connection, I went for a holiday. I was posting beautiful pictures documenting my trip. As soon as I was back in the hotel, we were writing. Having an IPhone and an IPad with Internet on both, communication was easy. It was quite surprising how remote places in Australia I was able to connect and post through Facebook! Wow, technology has improved dramatically recently!

Because of the 9 hours time difference we both got time to enjoy our days and get on with things. As soon as I opened my eyes, he was still up waiting for me to log in and we were corresponding! As soon as I finished teaching in the evening, I logged in and he was waiting for me to communicate. It was a real thrill! It was more than romantic! My IPad was right next to my bed and I was so excited that many times I really could not sleep, just had to check my messages!

From my holiday I sent him a little parcel with a great Australian T-shirt in it and another parcel to her sister and her husband. They were so surprised and happy when they got the parcels! He even won the t-shirt at a conference where a picture was taken of him in the Australian t-shirt. It made me so happy to see him looking so good and happy wearing what I sent to him! He even commented on the photo, what a difference a great t-shirt makes!

Our conversations and our language became very intimate but never inappropriate in any way which I liked. He seems to be a real gentleman when it comes to our communication. This really won me over. None of us understood how this attraction was possible between us from such a long distance without meeting. Our magnetic connection was so obvious to both of us and even to his sister that we openly discussed it. There was an incredible electricity between us through our emails and the way we talked about each other to others.

In the meantime I was also on emails and chats with his sister and her husband, talking about the old times, about the present, our work and business activities and planning the future. Communicating with his sister just made our whole connection more tight and familiar. Like suddenly I have found my family and I have found home. During this time she started to train my brother back home in business and they became very close with her and her husband.

As this intensive, long distance relationship formed and got stronger and stronger, one day he wrote that in September he would come and visit! He asked right away if this news scared me. Honestly, my immediate reaction was that I froze! For many reasons! One, that we just 'met'. Two, that it was a wild, huge idea, knowing where he was and in what circumstances. Also, the idea of meeting, suddenly brought things closer, more real. The impossible suddenly became possible! At the same time, I was very excited and gave us something to look forward to and to work towards. So we started to plan.

Dreaming, planning, discussing ideas and getting to know each other through letters of emails. It reminded me of the good old times, before telephone and emails, when lovers sent hand-written letters to each others from war and courted and loved each other through hardship and distance. There was something terribly romantic about this all. This only existed in novels. And once in my life before. Now I was living this myself and was loving every moment of it.

You can imagine that there were quite a few questions to answer between us. Not everything was so simple. As we got deeper and deeper in our communication, we had to work through a few issues. Thinking things through more realistically, we decided to reset the date of his and his sister's visit to 2014 so we all can put things in place. Mostly, I was wondering for how long this will last and how long can we keep up the intensity of our communication? Moving the date to 2014 not only gave us more time to save money and get prepared but to see really what was going on between us and how serious each of us were about this connection.

Talking with his sister and her husband a few times a week was really reassuring. I got a lot of inside information from them, otherwise I would have never received if they were not his family and my friends, too. It was a bit like an arranged marriage where although the couple don't know each other, the families do. Now that was a strange thought...

After my holiday when I returned home we continued our usual Facebook rituals. IPad next to my bed, waking up in the middle of the night to check if he is up and checking if I have mail. Getting up early to catch him still awake before he goes to bed, checking each other's page and writing comments. Smiley faces and hearts were flying with the hundreds and I could not wipe the smile off my face all day. However, we were both getting extremely tired during the day and was wondering how I can keep things up and still do my work and run my businesses the way I normally do! Things had to change. We could not keep this up at this speed and intensity!

We got to know each other pretty well. We have a lot in common and we share a lot of interests. We have so much that connects us through our past, his sister and the city where I come from. There is a whole web that connects us, even before meeting. There was something incredibly beautiful and romantic in this 'Platonic' relationship.

Like most men when they get serious and become purposeful, he started to think, plan and jumped into action. Guess what happened? Suddenly he was not up all the time and the emails got shorter and less frequent. On one hand this was really good. However, I was totally addicted to our communication! Because we did not work out a schedule how we do this all, it was really painful when I logged in and he was not there or what is worse, there was no letter from him! That really got to me!

Then after a longer period of silence and little visibility he wrote a beautiful email that nothing ever will change and he won't go away even if I ever would want to get rid of him. However, now he has to do a few things and put things in place. He does not know how long this will take. That was one of the nicest letter I have ever received from someone.

While this letter was always in my head, doubt hit its head in my heart and was questioning everything. Every time something happened and I voiced my doubts, he was there, answered and reasoned in a very calm and down to earth manner that I could only admire.

It is amazing when you are in a long distance relationship like this what little gestures and subtle things make a difference. We have no more space between us and we live our lives independently. However, we are there for each other and we see our goal, the visit next year and we are working towards that. He is just starting today a big run of 220km-s with two of his friends and I am so excited and nervous for them. What really touched me was that he said good-bye while I did not know that it will be the last time before they leave for the trip. Fortunately, I sent him a small parcel with a few little gifts, including another t-shirt which I was hoping he would get just before they leave. This morning, his sister messaged me on Facebook, that she went to visit him and her mum yesterday and guess what was on the table? My parcel! Although I have not heard from him, I got the news from his sister and how happy that gift made him feel. Now I am relaxed about this all. He must feel loved and thought of! I am happy!

Time has passed. It is now four months that we have been corresponding. While I have no idea where this all will lead and how it all will end up, I can't give it up or close it down with him. It is too good. It is nice to believe in another person and feel the connection even through this huge distance. While I am doubting and questioning, there is this returning question...what if? I can't miss this chance until I don't know the answer. Until I met him. Until I know he is or he isn't the one.

You might ask, what is the reality behind this all? How likely that we ever would meet and live in the same country and city? Meeting, that is not a problem. I easily could take a trip home. If they are serious, the next year visit could become reality as well. With his sister we discussed living somewhere in Europe. We even agreed on a country we all like. I have been thinking of moving closer somewhere in Europe just to be closer to my only family, my very much loved and missed brother.

So, at the end...anything is possible. Life has truly strange ideas about people and relationships and how they can or can't work. However, ask me in a few months or a year's time how this connection is going!

While I was writing this article about my very personal life, I was listening to the amazing Jazz singer, Diana Krall. Enjoy her Quiet Nights album and cross fingers for me, please!

Cheers, Piroska


Street Talk

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