A high dependency relationship to me is where, one of the partners or both are completely devoted to the other, above anything else in their lives.

This high dependency in a relationship is more likely for one person to be highly dependent on the other person. Sometimes highly dependent partners are described as having an addiction to love. Which ever way the dependency falls, it is not an equal or a healthy relationship.

Unhealthy high dependency love

• Wanting to spend all your time with your partner. When your love is based on high dependency, your life revolves around the other persons needs. The other person may like this close attention for a while but eventfully could feel that it becomes stifling and oppressive.

• Not seeing your friends. You put your partner before your friends and isolate yourself form others.

• Forgetting about your own interests and hobbies. As a highly dependent partner you are likely to forget your own self and stop doing the things that you did before the relationship for yourself.

• Wanting to please your partner all the time

• Becoming jealous and insecure if they haven’t texted you or phoned you in the day. If your partner begins to want to do activities on their own it is likely that this will rouse feelings of jealously and insecurity in their partner. The relationship can quickly become one of distrust and can easily break up.

• Constantly thinking and worrying they might leave you. High dependency is born out of deep fear that this person might leave you. However it does not matter how much you try to please or control your partner, you ultimately have no control over what they may or may not decide to do.

• When someone has over dependency on another person then if that person is no longer there then they will be deeply affected. They will also try to replicate the love with another person and transfer their love to the new partner.

• Always thinking about your partner and missing them

• Planning your day around your partner. The high dependency relationship the partner wants to spend all the time with the other person demanding their attention in some way

• Putting up with and tolerating bad behaviour from your partner that lowers your self esteem. Someone who is over dependent on the other person will tend to put up with bad behaviour from their partner and will tolerate this. When asked about their relationship the will only talk about their partner in a positive way and their focus is only on the best part of their relationship.

This kind of unhealthy relationship is almost like having an addiction to the other person. Like a drug you take, you need your daily fix of seeing this person and then, all is then right with the world

It would be advisable that someone who is highly dependent in their relationship with their partner should try to work through the reasons why they behave the way they do or to seek professional advice.