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You have just discovered that your spouse has been cheating on you. This is definitely not going to be an easy period but it is indeed the best time to analyze your relationship and think about what you are going to do next. You have to think about how to save your marriage if you do not want to end the relationship, or would you prefer to put an end to this.
Now you have to take some time to reconsider your love for your spouse. Would you still be able to love him or her like before, now that you are aware of the affair? However, it is important to keep in mind that there is a deeper issue lying underneath the infidelity. What has caused your spouse to stray?
I am not saying that you are at fault but it does two hands to clap. There is definitely a problem in the marriage so your task at hand is to find a solution to this problem. Do not be hasty in your decision and opt for a divorce right away, especially if you have children in the picture. They are usually the ones who are most deeply hurt if the family beaks up, so carefully consideration is very important!
So how you decide if the marriage is worthwhile saving? First of all, both of you should take a break from each other. This is for the purpose of moving away from the situation for a moment and looking at things from a different perspective. You may wonder if this is an advisable move as it would mean allowing your spouse a good chance to return to the affair. On the other hand, if your spouse really returns to the affair during this period, isn't it an indication to you right away that the relationship is really not worth saving after all?
Now that you are away from each other, you should carefully consider your feelings for your spouse. Is your love still there and do you still want to continue living with your spouse? If you do want to end your relationship, would you be able to start life afresh and not bring up the affair again? Also, think about what could have caused your spouse to stray? Do you spend enough time with each other and are you still as intimate as before?
Once you have come to a conclusion, it is time to arrange for a heart-to-heart talk with your spouse. However, make sure your kids are not present, in case things turn ugly. Moreover, with your children around, it is never possible to speak your mind and be open with each other.
Make sure you remain calm during your meeting with your spouse and allow them a chance to speak their minds. If you have decided to keep the relationship, you might want to find out more tips on how to save your marriage and not allow the same situation from happening again.
One important tip if you want to save your marriage is to plan a getaway for a start but ensure that you do not bring your children along. By being away from the scene of all the unhappiness, you will be able to rekindle that love and strengthen the relationship. Make sure you include open communication in your marriage from now onwards.
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