No man will ever understand his wife completely. However, with the proper attitude and actions, he can show his spouse love beyond her wildest dreams. Loving your spouse will be a lifelong process and it began when you said “I do”. Love is an action word not just a feeling word. Love needs to be expressed in action towards your spouse.

Most men are not trained in the area of how to love and show affection to their wives. Women on the other hand, are naturally inclined for loving and to love. I think it’s very revealing that the Bible never commands the wife to “love” her husband, but it does command the husband to “love” his wife. For a man to successfully love his wife, it will require work and effort on his part. I will say this again, it will require work and effort on your part.

The first thing that a husband should know about his wife is what her love language is. By that I mean, what kind of actions will your wife interpret as ‘my husband loves me’? Knowing your wife’s love language will go a long way in developing and showing love to your spouse. I know what you may be thinking; how can I find out what my wife’s love language is? Good question. The answer is very simple; I can recommend that you read the book “The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman. In his book he states that there are five love languages that each of us humans express to each other. All of us have at least one and some may have more than one. These love languages are:

• Words of affirmation
• Quality time
• Receiving gifts
• Acts of service
• Physical touch

My recommendation is that both spouses sit down together and read this book. If you are thinking about marriage or are engaged, then read this book together before getting married.

Upon reading this book, I discovered that my wife’s love languages were “quality time”, “receiving gifts”, and “physical touch”. Knowing these love languages meant I had to focus my attention, effort and actions in these three areas. To demonstrate quality time, I have to turn off the TV, computer, or MP3 player, and give her “quality time”. She likes shopping, and going to rummage and garage sales. I learned that by going with her I was showing her that I loved her.

This is when my wife began to experience the feeling of love from her husband beyond her wildest dreams. The biggest learning experience for me has been to focus my actions in these areas. Of course, I always say “I love you” to her all the time. When I get up and when I got to bed and during the day.

The main concern for us men is to be sure that our definition of love for our wives is matching theirs. Sometimes we think bringing home the bacon is showing our wife we love her and she should be happy, however, in reality she’s thinking quite differently. Why? Because the actions that we do we think are showing her love but they are not actually meeting her love language. The same is true for us men. We need to know that our wife also loves us, based on our love language.

Conclusion

Loving your spouse will not be easy. However, by learning to know what love language your wife likes will start the process of your spouse experiencing love beyond her wildest dreams.

By following these techniques you can learn to love your spouse.