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It's a relationship myth that giving your boyfriend an ultimatum will send him packing. In point in fact, it might be just what he needs to happen to get his mind made up about if or when he will propose to you. If you have been seeing each other for a long time and he's not showing any signs of a proposal, you really should have a heart to heart conversation to get him motivated. Just be aware men are notoriously spooky about until death do you part, so having this conversation can be rather delicate.
When you're planning on having your chat about when will he propose? It important you know when to bring up the issue. Each couple and relationship has a different pace, so there's no rule that says he should be proposing after six months or any other frame of time. That said here are some guidelines to consider. If you have been an item for only three or four months, it may be premature to be picking out your ring.
At this stage in the game, you're still learning about each other, and it might come across as being pushy. At the same, it's not realistic to be waiting for years before you talk about it either. After you've been seriously dating, for a year or more, it's okay to want to talk to him about when will he propose?
You have to be careful how you go about issuing an ultimatum. This can come across a threat and make your boyfriend feel like he's in a cage or on a leash. To avoid freaking him out, it's essential that you are firm, but cool about it. The most effective way of staying relaxed is to bring it up as soon as you realize that getting married has been on your mind often.
If you hold back until your boiling mad, you're going to come across as impatient. When you start having persistent wedding-bell urges, pick a non-stressful time to have your chat, make him a romantic special dinner...He is sure to ask what the occasion is.
Then, be honest and direct. Men don't response well to hints, so just telling him bluntly what you desire will get the best results. Tell him you see yourself as his wife and that you would like to know if he's thinking about when will he propose to you? Or try I love spending time with you and would like to take our relationship deeper. I want to know if you feel the same about me.
After you've delivered your Ultimatum it's time to back off. And don't anticipate that he will get down on his knee's right then and propose. Let him think about it for two weeks to a month about what you said. This will certainly help him decide if he wants to get married or not. After the month has passed, have another romantic dinner and ask him if he's given any thought to wanting to get married, and do not talk about it until this time. If he's not ready to get married it will be up to you now if you will wait or move on.
Ask and answered, tell him to speak up, it is only fair, why waste time on something that is never going to happen. I have known couples that have been together for years and just when you are wondering when the day will come they break and the man has gone off with another and within months married. Don't be afraid to force or ask about a committal, it might just save a heart break later.
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