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Coming off the worst year for movie ticket sales since 1995, the movie industry hit some serious lows in 2011 for filmmaking quality. Leading the pack in the Top 10 of the absolute, horrible, bad movies of 2011 was Adam Sandler with 3 films (he stars in one and produced 2), although some movie critics may place the "Just Go With It" star on their top 10 list every year.
Nevertheless, these are my choices for the worst films of the year:
10) The Zookeeper -- An Adam Sandler production, need we say more? Kevin James plays a Zookeeper, who believes he must leave the zoo and his closest companions the animals, to find the girl of his dreams. When the animals find out that their beloved caretaker wants to leave, they let him on a big secret--they can talk! The animals then teach him the art of courtship. Seriously? Ugh!
9) Your Highness -- You'd have high expectations with a film featuring James Franco and Natalie Portman but noooooooo!!!!! A medieval film with a big budget, elaborate costumes, but a below-average comedy film with more misses than hits! Danny McBride wrote the film and stars in it. Of course, he plays a slacker who hangs with his almost perfect older bro (Franco) to save princesses, slay dragons, save their land, and maybe turn himself into a hero! Too bad he couldn't save the movie.
8) Season of the Witch -- Nicolas Cage is taking any movie role he's offered to pay off his debts and he wound up with this clunker. Cage plays a heroic crusader who transports a woman accused of being a witch to a remote monastery. Little does he know that the girl has a terrible secret and they must battle a powerful force that may lead to destroying the world! The film has cheapness written all over it but as long as Nicolas Cage gets paid that's all that matters.
7) Dream House -- The horror film, starring real-life couple Daniel Craig and Rachel Weisz, was anything but scary and the plot was agonizingly slow. The couple moves into a home that was the scene of a grisly murder. Too bad the movie trailer spelled out the plot of the movie which came as no surprise to the people who sat through this for 1 hour and 30 minutes.
6) What's Your Number? -- Many who sat through this thought that actress/comedian Ana Faris deserved better but oh well. Faris plays Ally Darling, who believes she's going to be alone forever, starts on a journey to find the best ex-boyfriend she ever had. Yep, Faris deserved better and so did the audience who watched this mess!
5) Conan the Barbarian --- People were excited for former "Baywatch" star Jason Momoa to become a big star but the movie studio Lionsgate did not do him a favor with this remake. You would think that this reboot should have been better than the 1982 original but that wasn't the case. The movie was a badly done second-rate remake that had bad storytelling and silly dialogue. Basically, it made the original almost "Oscar-worthy!"
4) Abduction -- Oh no, another Lionsgate bomb! Taylor Lautner is a likable-actor but the action/adventure film was as enjoyable as getting a "root canal!" For the teenage girls who liked this film, Lautner blinded them for 1 hour and 46 minutes. The "Twilight star" played a young man in the case of mistaken identity but it left many ticket buyers thinking they made a mistake when they chose to watch this movie.
3) Passion Play -- So Megan Fox left "Transformers 3" for this? Ugh! The movie was so bad, it must have left some audiences wondering if the editor and film studio actually did anything to save it.
2) Jack and Jill -- It's Adam Sandler in dual roles playing a guy and a girl. Enough said.
1) Bucky Larson: Born to be A Star -- An Adam Sandler production and written by him too! Comedian Nick Swardson, plays Bucky Larson, a budding Adult film star. That's where the interest ends. . . really. The film is like a bad "Saturday Night Live" skit gone extremely bad. It's amazing that some audiences stayed through the entire 1 hour and 36 minutes! Makes one wonder why someone didn't sell an "I Survived Watching Bucky Larson: Born to be A Star" t-shirt!
Good article Paul, unfortunately there were many bad movies last year. LOL
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