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Ever so strong are OUR heroes at home. Our spouses and children are the "real" heroes to the military member. They keep going and carry on in our absence, and for that we are very grateful. Often not enough is said about the trials and tribulations they endure while we are deployed to wherever we have to go. The military family is far different from any other type of family. They must deal with missing a loved one for extended periods of time, and at the same time, carry the torch of faith, love, and perseverance.
The military spouse is by far, in my opinion, a true warrior. They must wear several hats and take up the reins of homemaker, provide child care, pet care, car washer, laundry and dish washer, and many other duties. No matter if the spouse is a man or woman, they are pulling double duty at home. Most non military families don't have to go through what these families do.(not taking away anything from other families by the way.)
Another important job held by the military spouse is keeping the home fires burning. While patiently awaiting the deployed member of the family to return, they must keep a stiff upper lip. Deployments can be a major adjustment for the newly married couple. They may not know how to cope at first. Ultimately understanding, support and love can help them with the issues that may surface while separated. Most of, if not all, of the armed forces now have spouse support groups and they can help families to get through the tough times of deployment.
These support groups often assist the family with various tasks around the home. Most offer meetings, where spouses of other members deployed can talk about the anxieties that are causing pain or suffering at home. This can be important, because, spouses that have dealt with deployment numerous times, can offer advice and support. These veteran deployment spouses can help the new to the deployment scene spouses with shared experience in dealing with the deployments.
By no means is being a military spouse a walk in the park. PCS moves, TDY's and full blown deployments can take its toll on your nerves. I was lucky enough to have had two spouses to help me with the home front while I fulfilled my deployment duties. Unfortunately, over time, the cost can often be too much for the warrior at home. Sometimes things don't work out like we think they should. It can be a very sobering moment in life, when the stay at home warrior admits that they are no longer able to handle the heavy burdens of dealing with a deployment. With all that is going on in world now, I can't blame my former spouses for being up front and honestly admitting that the load was too heavy. I really feel for the military families that are now facing the ongoing, upcoming and continuous deployments ahead.
This reality we live in can also have a positive impact on some family relationships. I know of a young man that had recently become unemployed and is now training hard to meet his upcoming deployment tasks with a positive take on the situation. This deployment will help him and his newlywed wife to save money towards a new vehicle or home upon his return. His spouse has experience with deployments, for she is my daughter. I am lucky to be here for her and him and can assist them during this time. God bless our spouses, our children, our pets and all of us. May peace prevail sooner than later.
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