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parenting
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expecting mother
lack of knowledge
helplessness
single parent
first steps
ordeal
parenthood
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My Parenting Resolution For 2013
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My Parenting Resolution for 2013

We're finally in 2013, and my parenting resolution for this year could be summed up in one word: patience. Funny thing is... my little girl isn't even born yet! Dealing with a pregnant wife for the first time is a challenge of its own, and certainly not one I expected. Our ability to bring this pregnancy to full term (with about 8 weeks to go) will rest alot on how well I can rise above my own impatience and lack of knowledge.

How to Improve Preparedness to Be a First Time Dad

I don't think anyone realizes how utterly unprepared a first time dad can be. Unless you were the type of boy who grew up as the oldest in a single parent household you just don't know what you are in for. Even then, a sibling-surrogate dad still does not usually have to deal with the unusual burden of being the supportive coach or husband of an expecting mother... and boy can that be challenging sometimes! So my first steps in improving my ability to be a supportive husband and future father was to be honest with myself and recognize that I didn't know very much and what little I did know wasn't usually particularly helpful. Recognizing my own ignorance has dramatically ramped down the frustration and helplessness I have felt at times during this ordeal. It has allowed me to be more forgiving both of myself and my expectant wife - in situations both related to and not related to the ongoing pregnancy. So I would give the following advice to expecting fathers to be: a little patience, latitude, and forgiveness (both of yourself and your partner) can go a LONG way.

How I Prepared Our Family for Parenthood Leading Up to 2013

There are a number of things I have done in the last several months in preparation for the arrival of our daughter. My number one focus has been on doing what I could to reduce the psychological burdens my partner (now wife) faced. Over the last several months we have taken a nice - pre-honeymoon if you will - vacation in Las Vegas where we truly enjoyed ourselves and reaffirmed our bond over the similar tastes we have in living, lifestyle, and what we enjoy doing together. Not long after returning from our trip we made arrangements to get married, which we did in late November 2012. Lastly because of our relatively humble lifestyle and a little extra money I make on the side, my wife was able to quit her job, get on my health insurance policy, and spend 100% of her energy on preparing herself and our home for our new daughter. I know not all fathers are able to do this for their partners / wives but whatever worries you can relieve your wife of will most definitely improve the health of your unborn child. The studies linking increased stress to pregnancy difficulties are very well documented. It behooves any expectant father to reduce or eliminate psychological burdens in whatever way you can.

How I Will Implement My 2013 Resolution as an Expecting Parent

As I prepare for the final stages of our pregnancy in 2013 my resolution has been to continue my development as a more patient, understanding, and forgiving person. Anyone who knows me well knows my internal struggle with these things. In addition to continuing to develop good mental habits in dealing with family, I am also trying to do more to fill in at least some of the gaps in my parenting knowledge. I have supported my wife's decision to enroll in (and attend) lamaze classes given at our local hospital. I am resolved to continue to expand my ability to financially support her as a fulltime mother and home-maker. Lastly I am doing what I can to keep fun in our lives even though it can be difficult to manage and I fail repeatedly. Lastly, I am still learning to be understanding and forgiving (both myself and others) for things I do not understand, can not predict, and have no control over. It's an odd experience to be sure, but I am coming to find that becoming a father in 2013 may have been the best medicine for improving my own personal mental health as well.


Street Talk

Well she finally came, Caylee Anne born 3/14/13 - Pi day.

Reply
  about 9 years ago
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