This Article is About
special needs children
two choices
second choice
perfect world
large portion
amount of money
No Kids “Aloud”
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There seems to be a revolt being chronicled in the blogs. There are two camps. A large portion of the public is tired of ill-mannered children. The other camp is outraged that children should be discriminated against.

Let me first say that I enjoy well-mannered children. I will also be plain and say that I do not have much patience for children who are not held accountable for there behavior. That being said does not make this about special needs children. My background is special education and when you shout special needs over behavior, that's like playing the race card and is intended to shut down any sort of dialogue.

Let's examine the issue and see what seems to be unreasonable. First of all the people being heard are being heard because they hold a big portion of the discretionary dollars still available to merchants. These people are saying that when they spend a good amount of money on entertainment, whether it is a nice meal at good restaurant, or a movie, they believe it is their right to enjoy it.

Let's look at some analogies. When you have paid full price for cable and then there are technical issues such as static or audio issues you have two choices. You can call the cable company and let them know you have unacceptable service and you expect it to be fixed and those days taken off your bill. Your second choice is to say, I'm sure they have not been in the cable business long and don't know what's expected or how to perform better, I'll just pay my bill and be patient until they are a more mature company. In the day and age of HG TV I don't see option to as a real life option. It's more of a perfect world option.

I do not think that it is unreasonable for paying customers to enjoy what they pay for. Also they are not saying you can't take your child out in public, they are saying take them to places that are age appropriate. It does not have to be relegated to fast food; there are a number of kid friendly chains out there. If you require a fancier meal and believe you must take your child, or you still feel that this issue is a social outrage, then there's a niche that will need to be filled. Open a high-end restaurant where children can be noisy and run around where ever they want. Hope you’re able to stay open, most people do not enjoy that dining experience.

I would be remiss if I didn't offer a solution before this trend becomes the norm. How about at fast food restaurants you teach your child the expected behavior and then you too can enjoy the nice restaurant. This is what I see when I go out. Adults visiting, oblivious to what the child is doing until there is a big scene, then the parent is angry and threatening at the child. My other pet peeve is the child who has been condoned by ignoring to go mommy,mommy,mommy,mommy... Until mommy gets mad or gives up and answers him. Do we as adults tolerate being ignored? No, you are enforcing a horrible habit by doing that. You child needs to know that you care about their needs. So if you are speaking to another adult, stop yourself and tell the child,” I am speaking to so and so right now. It is rude to interrupt. I will see what you want when I am through.” Now don't wait the entire conversation. Finish the thought with the adult and the answer the child. The child will learn that is expected behavior for both of you.

It is also a good idea to discuss situations and the expected behaviors prior to being in a situation. Teach our child some vow verbal communication where they can quietly and politely get your attention and you have a way of acknowledging them so they can be patient. Be sure to reward them initially in private. Later on your praise will be sufficient. Can we please get back to a generation of respect and courtesy?


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