This Article is About
fishing rod
proper direction
tantrums
reflections
Raising Them Up!
Join 1000's of Authors at StreetArticles Today!

How does inflicting pain upon a child intentionally, help the child? I do understand the fundamentals of spanking. I got my share as a child of ten and gave my children their share also. The thought of inflicting pain never occurred to me, either in the receiving mode or the giving mode. A spanking drew attention that an act was inappropriate like a knee jerk response. It was something feared, but when about to get one, I knew I'd done something wrong. A learning tool, but never a bruise!

Anyone trying to equate the phrase, "Spare the rod, spoil the child." as meaning inflicting pain upon a child using a rod they chose, to correct the child, and this would somehow keep the child from being spoiled, is not in accordance with "love" especially God's love. It is not only ignorant, intolerable, it is disgusting. Give direction, let your rod be your words, actions and deeds!!!

Words are reflections and the word rod in Biblical terms means direction, such as; piston rod, divining rod, lightning rod, fishing rod, in our present world and with, "thy rod (direction) and thy staff (leadership) they comfort me!" Therefore, people of the cloth and all religions should teach the word according to "love"! Hence, "Spare the rod (direction), spoil (deny) the child." For a child without a proper direction from adults will certainly be spoiled (denied) the opportunity they so rightly deserve.

A child learns through sin (missing the mark) and when an action beyond the norm comes from a child, the child needs to have a direction. A quick swat upon butt cheek, a tug of the arm to redirect, a shout from an adult, is often enough to suffice. But, never should an intentional "strike to cause pain" be administered or permitted.

If your little one is throwing tantrums, there is one quick way to make them stop without inflicting pain. Whatever it is they are doing, you mimic it, but be louder and funnier! They'll stop quickly and watch you. Just refrain from giving their action attention, you become the attention. They stop because they learn their tantrum does not benefit them. Scream, pretend you're crying, pound the floor, kick your feet, flail your arms - hey, good exercise and nobody feels pain. Laughter ensues! Should your child not stop, there may be and underlying problem of health.

Children, between the ages of birth to twelve years of age, learn quickly to respond to a change of voice in an adult, or a glaring look from the adult. Should they not do so, removing the child to a neutral place and explaining to them their negative action and the consequence of such action, may alter their behavior. Encouraging a response from the child as to why they acted negative is most important (if the child is old enough to relate). Then strongly explaining that the behavior they exhibited will not be tolerated in the future and directing them to a better or another way of acting or reacting teaches them. They can have a time out, loss of toys they enjoy for a while, but explaining how they should have properly handled their situation is of most importance to them. If they go near a hot stove, don't just scold them, explain to them how the hot stove can harm them IF THEY ARE NOT CAREFUL! A child's curiosity is too often misunderstood as disobedience. Ask questions parents!

When children reach the age of puberty, none should be hit in the rear end. There are many ways to punish a child, without intentionally inflicting pain. Restrictions, taking away their favorite pass time, creating more chores, them writing down the best way they can cease their negative actions, and a multitude of other alternatives to promote positive acts from a child. If an adult thinks their teen cannot be reached via verbiage or restrictions, they should solicit other adult influences, whether it be the clergy, school resource officer, police, family members, neighbor or anyone the child may look up to.

I can promise, if you swat a young man or lady reaching puberty, on their rear, it will anger them and they won't think of what they've done wrong, they'll think of how to retaliate. Their changing body is already experiencing enough with growing pains, don't add to it physically.

I've raised, helped to raise, taught and counseled many children throughout my life. When a child is old enough to relate and you, ask them why they made a bad choice and "listen" to their response; ask the child what they think the correct punishment should be. You'll be surprised, as most often, they will suggest a harsher punishment than you'd have thought of. Then be an adult, act accordingly and compromise with the punishment. If they tell you they don't know why they acted as they did, then that was their reason. Teach them to think before they act and verbally walk them through their situation, both ways, how they did it and how it could have been handled differently. What they don't know, they don't know!

A unique way, my best friend used, when correcting his misbehaving pre-teen child (after he once spanked her and felt so terribly bad for it) was to have the child find her own switch, go to a corner of the room and switch herself for being bad. He did not set the number of switches she was to give herself, nor did he threaten her. She immediately cried as she knew she made bad choices, she picked her switch and as she walked to the corner, she'd cry uncontrollably and when there she would switch herself, stop and ask for forgiveness. What a marvelous approach that was so balanced. I've spoken to that child, now fully grown, and she remembered how she learned not to misbehave and how humiliating it was for her to pick her switch, but she learned quickly what to do and what not to do.

Late teen years are the most daring in raising a child, but we have to remember that "love" for a "child" is the only love that is to grow to separation. The child is becoming their own adult and somewhere, somehow, sometime, in their close to adult age, you'll probably say, "I hate you!" What you are really saying is, I hate the way you are acting and I hate that I cannot control you. It is that separation time, they've grow-up. Don't over react, and explain how you feel and try to get their reactions. Also, remember "love" for your child "has to come to separation" for you have to begin to love your child as an adult. You never stop loving the child, per se' you redirect your need to discipline the child into understanding your new adult. You're not sparing the rod (direction) if you refuse to strike your child to inflict pain, you are giving your understanding, attention, patience and cooperation of direction and it will come to fruition when your child becomes an adult.

Raising them up is a rewarding responsibility and when we feel, within our heart, we've done the best we could, it is a success. We have no control of how they act as adults, for that is their world and they have to grow on in their choices. When we have met our responsibility, by giving direction, without intentionally inflicting pain upon our child, we stand above those who choose the easy way out and use a rod, of their choosing, not the Bible's, to inflict bodily and mental pain.

Respect you child and always refrain from disciplining him/her in the presence of others. Taking the time to remove your child to a neutral area, away from siblings, friends or other adults will give you time to plan the direction you want to give the child, it gives your child time to ponder of what bad choice he/she may have done to cause your actions. Respect you child with comparable respect you are afforded in life, no double jeopardy. Children should be punished once for their bad act, not by mom and then dad too. Too much punishment for one mistake makes them numb to discipline. They'll become immune to direction and continue to do what they need to for attention. Communication with your child at any age promotes thy rod and thy staff that comforts them. Don't beat them down, raise them up!!!


Street Talk

No comments present
You May Also Like
Compact Fishing Rod
A lightweight, compact fishing rod in your arsenal, is an important tool to have if you are a serious angler. The old days of having the 12 foot rigid bamboo pole are long gone, and technology has finally caught up with the needs of the travelling fisherman, or a fisherman…
By: Pescatore in  Recreation and Sports  >  Fishing   Aug 16, 2012  
1
  Likes: 2

Ugly Stik - A Tried And True Fishing Rod
If you are a fisherman and you hear the name "Ugly Stik" what is the first thing that comes to your mind? A good rod, an affordable rod, a durable rod, or a popular quality rod might be a few thoughts. I personally think it is a bit of all…
By: Aaron Stevenson in  Recreation and Sports  >  Fishing   Oct 21, 2011  
0
  Likes: 1

Fishing Rod Bag Prices
Many avid anglers spend large sums of money on good, high quality fishing gear. There are many brands available that make this a multi billion dollar market. Every year, newer technology is developed, making sleeker, more efficient products. These products fetch top dollar on the market, and fishermen line up…
By: Nate Killpack in  Recreation and Sports  >  Fishing   Mar 08, 2013  
0
  Likes: 0

A Few Thngs To Consider Before Buying Fishing Rods
If you are a newbie I guess you really need to know what a fishing rod is before you can go out and get a fishing rod. Just to put it really simple a fishing rod is just a long stick that is an important tool in catching fish. On…
By: Dale M in  Recreation and Sports  >  Fishing   Aug 18, 2011  
0
  Likes: 0

How to Make Some Money - 5 Steps to Make Money
All of us would like to earn some money. Maybe the money would be for a get-away weekend with your spouse, new tools, a different car, clothes, an ipad, new fishing rod, or golf clubs. I will let you in on a little secret -- You will not earn some…
By: Joe Lewiston in  Internet and Businesses Online  >  Internet Marketing   Sep 14, 2011  
0
  Likes: 0

Shakespeare Fishing Rods - The Best Fishing Rods
If you are serious about your fishing or even if you are not and just go every now and then,  you're going to need a good fishing pole right?  Well, the fishing rod that we are about to discuss is not just some average or cheap fishing rod.  These guys…
By: Aaron Stevenson in  Recreation and Sports  >  Fishing   Oct 10, 2011  
1
  Likes: 2

What Beginners Need For Fishing Gear
The time has come to learn how to fish. This will probably be the most fun you ever have learning anything but that really is what fishing is all about. The first thing is yo will need many different types of tackle. When it comes to fish they arent a…
By: Dale M in  Recreation and Sports  >  Fishing   Aug 29, 2011  
0
  Likes: 1

Braided Fishing Line Advantages
If you are an avid fisherman, than you are probably well aware of the advantages and disadvantages of using mono-filament fishing line. You may not be aware of the braided fishing line advantages. Lets compare the two below and see if adding a braided fishing line to your repertoire will…
By: Nate Killpack in  Recreation and Sports  >  Fishing   Mar 22, 2013  
0
  Likes: 0

Shakespeare Ugly Stiks
I have been an avid fisherman since I could remember that I even existed. I say that because I have pictures of myself when I was two years old with a rod in one hand and a fish in the other that I, of course, can't recall. Anyway, in some…
By: Aaron Stevenson in  Shopping and Product Reviews   Sep 21, 2011  
1
  Likes: 3

Ugly Stik Rods
If you're a novice fisherman, selecting the right kind of inexpensive fishing rod can be a  difficult decision, since any rod will vary the way it performs based on, brand, length and durability, it takes an experienced eye, to find exactly the perfect rod, and even then probably necessary to…
By: Aaron Stevenson in  Shopping and Product Reviews   Sep 23, 2011  
0
  Likes: 2

A Personal Story: Our First And Last Gender Role Swap Day
The idea came to us out of the blue We were sitting one rainy evening, after dinner, in the living room, my husband and I, when our young son barged in to announce that he was starving again. He was looking at me, as if inadvertently hinting that it was…
By: Lana Fleetwood in  Home and Family  >  Parenting   May 28, 2016  
0
  Likes: 0

5 Activities to Make Bonding Time With Kids Healthier
Kids seem to have all the time in the world. As a parent you want that time to count as quality, meaning bonding + learning + fitness. Don’t worry, your kids will love it as long the equation doesn’t say ‘= boring’. Here are suggestions on how you can make…
By: Baburaj Devi in  Home and Family  >  Parenting   May 23, 2016  
0
  Likes: 1

The Benefits Of Getting Expert Newborn Photography
The current trend with families today when expecting a new arrival is to prepare the best for the baby from basic essentials to newborn photography. It is probable that many new parents would want to have a professionally taken family photograph of their newborn bundle of joy even weeks of…
By: Jennifer Gordon in  Home and Family  >  Parenting   May 21, 2016  
0
  Likes: 0

Some Inspirational Quotes for Your Children
Parents are always the biggest influential personalities for their children. Whatever you say it matter a lot to them. When you say” Love you”, they really feel privileged. Such kind words with love can really change their thinking and life. The heroes for children are no one else but their…
By: jasmine william in  Home and Family  >  Parenting   May 20, 2016  
0
  Likes: 0

Funeral Services New Forest
When you are dealing with the loss of a person you care for, the last thing you want to do is make things worse. Even if you are grieving and there are few things that can take some of the pain away, there are other things that will make you…
By: Sheraton Veranda in  Home and Family  >  Parenting   May 15, 2016  
0
  Likes: 0

Article Views: 4194    Report this Article