This Article is About
confidence
james bond films
victoria pendleton
inner critic
dancing with the stars
gold and silver
piece of advice
Why Correcting Your Negative Self Talk Will Improve Your Confidence
Join 1000's of Authors at StreetArticles Today!

Why Correcting Your Negative Self Talk Will Improve Your Confidence

Are you one of those people who gives yourself a hard time when you don’t perform or achieve as well as you had hoped? If you are you’re certainly not alone. It’s really easy to let your inner critic dominate your thoughts and impact on your confidence. Let it get out of hand and you’ll find that you’re struggling with things that you really ought to be able to do quite easily. That’s why correcting negative self talk is important.

I’m current enjoying watching the latest series of Strictly Come Dancing on the BBC. Dancing with the Stars is the equivalent programme in the States. In each case ‘ celebrities’ learn to dance with a professional partner. In the UK, the celebrities are a mixture of well known actors, television presenters and sports men and women. It’s always interesting to see the stars who you would expect to be good dancers and brimming with confidence suddenly find themselves struggling in an environment that is well outside their comfort zone.

This has been very evident in the latest UK series of ‘Strictly where Victoria Pendleton, Gold and Silver medalist in the cycling at the recent London Olympics has found that her well toned cycling body, with her rigid ankles was not ideal for dancing. Despite being a hard worker, in the first week of competition she was in tears as she danced very poorly and found herself in last place on the Leaderboard. Being unused to failure – she was devastated.

Dancing in the same series is Colin Salmon , who appeared in three James Bond films alongside Pierce Brosnan who apparently gave the former cyclist some advice. He told her ‘You’re not good enough to be so hard on yourself’.

When I read this, I realised immediately that this was the best piece of advice he could have given her. There’s absolutely nothing wrong in having high standards and expecting the best of yourself, but you still need to give yourself the time to master something new. Pendleton was making things considerably worse for herself and knocking her own confidence with her negative self talk.

Is this a scenario you recognise? I certainly do. You may be very good in one area, or many areas of your life, but it’s only to be expected that at some point you will come up against something that doesn’t come naturally. If you give your inner critic free reign, if you start listening to it and believing it, you will be foolishly damaging your own confidence. It’s important that you take the time to learn, apply, take action, accept that you will make mistakes, learn from them and improve.

Salmon’s pep talk with Pendleton must have worked, because although she has continued to expect a lot of herself and has continued to work incredibly hard, it’s obvious that she is more accepting of her own frailties. During the last three weeks she has learned to relax more, accepted her mistakes, improved her performance and ultimately exuded a lot more confidence.

A lesson for us all. Wait until you’re ‘good enough’ before you start giving yourself a hard time. Correct the negative self talk and watch your confidence grow.


Street Talk

Hi Beverley, thank you for encouraging us to persevere when we try new things. I know I am not good at certain things. Therefore, I don't do very much mechanical work. I have tried it, and I found out I was better off allowing other people to do complicated mechanical work. I learned some simple things I can do so I don't have to ask for help all the time.

Reply
  about 8 years ago
  

Thanks Sarah. Glad you found it useful

Reply
  about 8 years ago

Positive thoughts create positive results! Nice one Beverley

Reply
  about 8 years ago
  

They do indeed. Thanks Shawn

Reply
  about 8 years ago

Thanks Beverley, I think I had some negative self talk this week.

Reply
  about 8 years ago
  

We all do James. Recognizing whats happening and taking steps to change your thinking is the important bit. Beverley

Reply
  about 8 years ago

I would like to agree with your article 100%

Reply
  about 8 years ago
  

Thanks Geoffrey. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Reply
  about 8 years ago
You May Also Like
How to Improve Confidence In 3 Easy Steps
Confidence affects not only the way we feel and the way others see us, it also affects our decisions, so learning how to improve confidence can change your life by changing your choices. Confident people are more likely to make decisions that benefit them, than those who lack confidence, they’re…
By: Debby Sanders in  Self Improvement  >  Personal Growth   Mar 04, 2012  
7
  Likes: 5

Earn Online With Confidence
Are you looking to earn online with confidence and the knowledge that you are not going to lose any money? These days there are more and more people unemployed and looking for possible employment opportunities. A lot of these people have been through university and are highly qualified but they…
By: Chris Evans in  Internet and Businesses Online  >  Internet Marketing   Sep 15, 2011  
3
  Likes: 0

Build Confidence With Women: The Don'ts
It is now common knowledge that many men struggle to become (or remain) confident around women they're attracted to. Some men (actually, many men) also lack confidence around women in general; whether it be co-workers, acquaintances, friends' girlfriends, etc. I understand, because in the past I've definitely had my issues…
By: Jon Reyes in  Relationships  >  Dating   Aug 29, 2013  
0
  Likes: 0

Build Confidence With Women: The Do's
Following up from the previous "Confidence With Women: The Don'ts" is this article on what to actually do in order to build more confidence with women. When all is said and done, there are plenty of things one can do to build more confidence with women. In this article, I'm…
By: Jon Reyes in  Relationships  >  Dating   Sep 05, 2013  
0
  Likes: 0

Confidence Is The Key You Need To Unlock Your Potential Door
What's the one quality that instantly transforms any task with which you perform it so dramatically that the same task performed without it would be barely recognizable in comparison? It's confidence. It's stunning that something so seemingly simple can be extremely powerful, almost magical. So what is confidence really? The…
By: Jon Eborn in  Self Improvement  >  Coaching   Sep 06, 2013  
1
  Likes: 1

Developing Your Strengths To Gain Confidence In Yourself
Each of us is unique and we each have our own talents and strengths, few however actually develop their strengths and use them to gain confidence in there-selves and to generally better there-selves. You've probably been told you're naturally gifted at something you enjoy doing, yet you let your skills…
By: Ricky O' Shea in  Self Improvement  >  Self Esteem   Apr 23, 2013  
0
  Likes: 0

Confidence Part Two
Recently I wrote about my first time on the Stage---the Theatre. I remember writing that it was the first of many but as I looked back through all of my stories, I realized that I have never written much about my acting career. Actually nothing. Why I asked myself? Because…
By: James Voerg in  Self Improvement  >  Inspirational   Apr 17, 2013  
0
  Likes: 0

Confidence, Confidence, Confidence!
“Amen!” So ended my Lovely Wife’s first sermon. Our Pastor was on vacation and she took on the challenge to lead our Worship Service. The question was, could she pull it off? Would she crack under the pressure? Should she really stretch out this Far? It all came down to…
By: James Voerg in  Self Improvement  >  Personal Growth   Apr 12, 2013  
0
  Likes: 0

Confidence is the Key to Success
In this chaotic society, we are all bombarded with different issues within our surroundings and even with our own selves. Many will try to put us down and would make things difficult for us. But despite it all, the only person who could help us rise up against negativity is…
By: nanette in  Self Improvement  >  Empowerment   Mar 19, 2011  
3
  Likes: 2

How to Improve Confidence With Women - 3 Simple Rules
If you're wondering how to improve confidence with women because you fear approaching them, there's a simple three-step method that can help you out.  Try implementing these three changes into your life, and you'll automatically get a boost of confidence every time you talk to someone. 1. Assess your life…
By: Max Grimnar in  Relationships  >  Dating   Sep 26, 2011  
0
  Likes: 3

Need to Learn to Build Confidence? Self-coaching is An Option
It’s a fact of life that some people appear to be naturally confident at everything they do and tackle every new task or challenge with enthusiasm and gusto. However, there are plenty of other people who are confident in some areas of their life but not in others and those…
By:  in  Self Improvement  >  Coaching   May 15, 2011  
0
  Likes: 3

Having Confidence in Self is Not for the Weak at Heart
Why do we sometimes lose all confidence in ourselves and our heart becomes too weak to fight? We all go through times in our lives when we get downhearted and feel we cannot change what is happening to us. Let’s examine some of the reasons we get ourselves into these…
By: Connie Milam in  Self Improvement  >  Spirituality   Jul 18, 2011  
0
  Likes: 0

How to Truly Build Confidence Forever
To teach or explain somebody to build confidence artificially is tough ask. Not because it is difficult to explain but because it is difficult to CONVINCE that the methods actually work! There are lots of ways and books on how to develop positive thoughts but why do people end up…
By: sumith in  Self Improvement  >  Positive Attitude   Aug 08, 2011  
0
  Likes: 0

How to Be More Confident
Confidence is important. When a person is confident, he can succeed in his career and in life. How can you become more confident? One way is to smile. Smiling makes you approachable. When you smile, people will seek you out--perhaps to be friends, or perhaps because they need help. If…
By: Hollie E. Townsend in  Self Improvement  >  Success   May 20, 2012  
5
  Likes: 4

Casino Restaurant Design
Casinos bring to mind images of bright lights, glamour, and glitter accompanied by laughter, cries of joy and the buzz of excitement surrounding wins and losses. Skillful casino restaurant design draws on all of these elements to create an environment that entices people from all walks of life. “Casino” is…
By: Paul Kelly in  Business  >  Restaurant Industry   Feb 21, 2012  
0
  Likes: 0

Article Views: 1389    Report this Article