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bad memories
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emotional stability
self assurance
emotional pain
Dating A Divorced Man
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Breakups are a normal part of life. We as humans go through many relationships before we finally settle down. And even then, we have quarrels and are at odds with the person we are supposed to spend our lives with. The end of a relationship means moving on to the next one, but the end of a marriage is not so simple. Men who fall out of love in a marriage usually start dating earlier than women to forget the bad memories. Some do so for companionship and yet others must fill the emptiness in their hearts.

You might be familiar with this, having dated a man recently divorced. However, this begs the question. Is it safe? Dating a man is daunting enough, a man just out of a relationship and you start to think he is just looking for a rebound. A man out of marriage? That seems like downright insanity! However, you must know that not all men who look for a relationship after a separation are just looking to fool around.

Dating a divorced man takes a lot of patience and self assurance that you're good enough to not just end up as a rebound girlfriend.

First, ask yourself if you are ready to take on the challenges that entering into such a relationship will bring about. This man could have kids or a business that he has built with his ex-wife that he has no choice but to continue managing. If there are such things, there will be times when you will be made to feel unimportant by circumstances or situations. If he has kids, you'll feel the pinch when he has to be a father and when he needs your help to mother children that are not yours. The emotional pain of a divorce can sometimes pale in comparison to the financial pain. A divorce could strip a man of most of his assets and finances and financial stability as well as emotional stability could be a large issue.

The second thing to do is to observe him. His actions and words. Are they consistent? Are they befitting of a man who is looking to assuage hurt or a man who is genuinely looking for another lifetime companion? Of course these signs will not be immediately clear but after he has taken the time to heal and repair his heart, you'll be better able to watch his behaviour. Is he overly aggressive and seems to unconsciously get physically or verbally abusive? Is his behaviour consistent or is it sporadic? Men do have emotions too and sometimes they deal with them in different ways. Sometimes a man who is sad will talk less or clam up, but at times he will get physical and violent. Most men who go through a divorce not of their own accord find it incredibly difficult to loosen up and enjoy life again. Give him his space and if he is having a bad day, don't take it to heart. Try being a friend and confidant first before making your intentions plain. It will show him that you care and are willing to support him in his time of need.

The third thing is to be certain that he likes you and possibly sees a new future with you. As with most people who have recently ended a relationship, they are not searching for something steady. It is highly likely he is merely expanding his social circle of females for the future. Don't throw yourself into things and help him deal with all his issues right away. Be honest to him and to yourself. If he tells you that he does intend to marry again, make sure that he is open to considering you as a potential candidate. Matured men are good at making their intentions and needs known. If you can show him you're sensitive to his needs and can pay attention to what he likes and dislikes, it could build rapport and bring the two of you closer together.

Dating a recently divorced man is almost the same as dating a man just out of a relationship. The fundamentals are the same but there will be more issues, problems and responsibility. Prepare yourself if you want to date such a man!

Street Talk

rich and informative article

  about 1 decade ago
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